Friday, June 27, 2014

Kinda How I Feel Lately

Schneider



1. Later Terminator models lacked the Panache of the T-800.

2. Standard Caption #16: "Oh, boy."

3.  "By the power of gray skull!"

4. "I am Zardoz!"

5. And on top of it all, he's wearing flip-flops.

Best of USMC2841
    Well, This answers CCR's question about who'll stop the rain.

Best of Dr. Doom
    When the Mayor of Hooker Valley loses a bet to the Mayor of He!!...

Best of Kaptain Krude
    Ang Lee's remake of Friday the 13th was, in many ways, more scary than the original.

Best of Artfldgr
    Worst Selfie Ever!!

Best of Best of
    The local sheriffs department floats a can't-miss demo reel to the producers of Cops

Best of fo steB
    This PBS vision-quest has been brought to you by the letters L, S, and D

Best of Mr Hankey
    The wizard played a cruel joke on Harry when he spoke the word SHAZAM.

Best of metalgarth
    "If it is not fashionable to wear nothing but a Speedo and flip flops, may Zeus strike me down"

Best of GregMan
Todd didn't know it yet, but he was about to get the greatest erection of his now much-shortened life.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Disgruntled WMZX weathercaster Phil Filkinburger's resignation broadcast was often played at company parties.

   
Best of dadoctah
    The Weather Channel: ratings sweeps edition.

37 comments:

USMC2841 said...

Well, This answers CCR's question about who'll stop the rain.

Double the U said...

Think how bad God's other choice must have been.

dadoctah said...

For those who have always wondered who could possibly look up to and admire Aquaman....

Dr. Doom said...

Number 1537a on the list of ways nature says STAY AWAY

Dr. Doom said...

When the Mayor of Hooker Valley loses a bet to the Mayor of He!!...

Kaptain Krude said...

Ang Lee's remake of Friday the 13th was, in many ways, more scary than the original.

Kaptain Krude said...

How Nature says, "Don't pick up hitch-hikers!"

Artfldgr said...

Worst Selfie Ever!!

Anonymous said...

Beware of catching thunderclap at the truckstop

Anonymous said...

A swig of white lightning may get you going, but you'll not like where you end up.

Who said anything about alcohol?

Anonymous said...

The local sheriffs department floats a can't-miss demo reel to the producers of Cops

Anonymous said...

No static cling means no transient voltage spikes

It's just good climate science

Anonymous said...

Special Olympics gold medalist Insane Bolt

Anonymous said...

This PBS vision-quest has been brought to you by the letters L, S, and D

Anonymous said...

Sure, a weathervane can tell you which way the wind blows, but only the Doppelgänger 5000 (TM), exclusively here on Channel 7, brings you radar images in Videodrome splendor! Long live the new flesh!

Anonymous said...

The genie asked, "If you could be any kind of tree, what tree would you be?" I sneezed, and the bastard turned me into kudzu.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Mother Nature's thawtbubble: Damn these new bifocals! He's a sitting duck and I can't hit the side of a barn.

-OR-

Elmer wasn't all that surprised that his disgruntled wife Doris announced she was leaving him.
The surprise was where and how:
1- Interstate rest stop
2- As a thunderstorm approached
3- While he was undressing
4- Because she claimed she was "in the mood" for some kinky make-up sex

Carpe Phlogiston said...

VtheK wasn't very clear about exactly how he feels:
a) totally mortified because a video of him sleepwalking went viral?
b) like a Walmart shopper?
c) the cops are deliberately harassing him for some reason?
d) that he forgot to do something before leaving the house... turn off the iron? let the dog out? GET DRESSED?

Kaptain Krude said...

"Something tells me I ain't in Kansas anymore."

Whacko said...

An engineer from UMass,
Had balls that were made out of glass.
He rubbed them together,
In bright stormy weather,
And lightening shot out of his ass.

Mr Hankey said...

Son of Frau Blücher

Mr Hankey said...

The wizard played a cruel joke on Harry when he spoke the word SHAZAM.

metalgarth said...

"If it is not fashionable to wear nothing but a Speedo and flip flops, may Zeus strike me down"

Submariner said...

Jerome was happy that when the lightning hit him, he was dressed more formally than his usual Depends and Crocs...

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
GregMan said...

Todd didn't know it yet, but he was about to get the greatest erection of his now much-shortened life.

GregMan said...

VtheK Thought Bubble: "...and may lightening strike me dead if I don't get to the Best Ofs in a more timely manner!"

Dr. Doom said...

Shortly after winning his law suit, Jones vs. the State of Utah, Larry attempted to marry his lightning bolt. His day went rapidly down hill from there...

Submariner said...

Full scale experiment using human hair as a substitute light bulb filament:
...in 3...
2...
1..

Carpe Phlogiston said...

♩ ♫ Won't you be my neighbor? ♪ ♬
Republicans responsible for throttling the PBS budget didn't see this coming - the cheap, direct-to-video "Mr. Rogers' Nephew" series

-OR-

Long before "2 girls and a cup" Ralphie inadvertently participated in scatological prOn by soiling his Speedo at the nudist camp.

-OR-

Disgruntled WMZX weathercaster Phil Filkinburger's resignation broadcast was often played at company parties.

Jay Guevara said...

Thought bubble: "Good thing that liberal over there said he loved America, or I could have had a real problem."

Submariner said...

The local Fire Island Channel's knockoff was a wee bit different than PBS's Mr. Rogers and his neighborhood...

Mr Hankey said...

..and The Lord said, "Let There Be Kyle"

Mr Hankey said...

"And who exactly is this "media" that updates the president on important issues?"

Submariner said...

What in the heck is Will Farrell up to THIS time?

Dr. Doom said...

Judgement Enumclaw...

dadoctah said...

The Weather Channel: ratings sweeps edition.