1. "I still can't believe HBO made a show about fat, dumb, promiscuous, overprivileged Girls and didn't invite Meghan."
2. "Dammit, laxative, kick in! Kick in, dammit!:
3. "There are punk kids in my yard, I just know it!"
4. "Let's see, what can I do to f--k over the party today?"
5. "Aw, f-ck, I was sure that was going to be a fart."
Best of Submariner
Almost lunchtime. Wonder if I have time to walk through the Inflatable Colon after this?
Best of Rodney Dill
..................
Best of Jack Reacher
"No matter what this guy says, I'm not buying the extended warranty."
Best of dadoctah
ORA: "Four-thirty, time for Wapner...."
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
This reminds me of that Amway sales spiel Boehner tricked me into attending. Fancy charts, vague promises and misleading statistics... politics is a lot like MLM schemes.
Best of Scotty G.
"Okay Senator, now show us the "Maverick" face.
Best of jimmy
Scientists revealed today that they have discovered portals to 908,564 parallel universes. It was immediately noted that none of the parallel earths surveyed thus far had John McCain winning their version of the 2008 election, either.
Best of Joshua
After a rough week John was looking forward to participating in the Celebrity Dead Pool. But, it didn't make him feel any better when he discovered that someone had picked him.
21 comments:
"Why the frak did I ever leave that nice, comfortable cage in Nam?!?
I wonder if Barry'd let me be his 2016 running mate instead of old Joe?
I still can't believe that frakkin' Kenyan Socialist beat me. Wonder if it's too late for a recount?
C'mon, priapsis; kick in!
...so what DOES a dog do on its day off?
yeah yeah yeah, limited government, less spending and more freedom... this aint your father's republican party Paul.
I left BO's dinner party for THIS load of crap?!?
Almost lunchtime. Wonder if I have time to walk through the Inflatable Colon after this?
..................
"No matter what this guy says, I'm not buying the extended warranty."
"How long has this guy been talking? When does someone else get a turn? This is so unfair. Gonna write my Congressman."
ORA: "Four-thirty, time for Wapner...."
In an attempt to fool those around him, McCain makes a "brrrrip!" sound with his mouth.
Last week the Senator received the second-biggest disappointment of his life when he was notified that he was not going to be part of this season's "Dancing With the Stars".
This reminds me of that Amway sales spiel Boehner tricked me into attending. Fancy charts, vague promises and misleading statistics... politics is a lot like MLM schemes.
-OR-
WTF!? Cash bar? Metal folding chairs. Penny ante candyass must have taken a community college lobbying course.
It rubs the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again.
"Okay Senator, now show us the "Maverick" face.
Scientists revealed today that they have discovered portals to 908,564 parallel universes. It was immediately noted that none of the parallel earths surveyed thus far had John McCain winning their version of the 2008 election, either.
"Hey, I didn't get a harumph out of that guy", thought the Senator...
Worst. McKayla Maroney imitation. Evar.
After a rough week John was looking forward to participating in the Celebrity Dead Pool. But, it didn't make him feel any better when he discovered that someone had picked him.
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