Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Cattle Drive

Brender


1. "Hey, mind if I steer for a while?"

2. Bessie thought the "Don't Hitch Hike!" warnings were overblown, but she ended up on a barbecue, just like the rest of them.

3. Janet Napolitano continues her tour of border areas.

4. Normally, cops in California would be inclined to write a ticket for expired plates, lack of a roof, removal of installed safety equipment, no license, no insurance, indecency with an animal, littering, unsecured cargo, drunk driving, and cattle rustling. But if they did, they would just get called racists, so they let this guy pass.

5. "You know, Frank, this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship."


Best of Submariner
Later, Bessie would find out why they call them "cow pokes..."

Best of Rodney Dill
Actually its a lot more like brown poopon than grey.

Best of dadoctah
Where minotaurs come from: Southwestern edition.

Best of Rodney Dill
In Texas, Coward ain't being chicken, its just a direction.

Best of Rodney Dill
I wish I knew how to quit you.

Best of GregMan
Yet another H1-B goes to work at IBM.

Best of Rodney Dill
(Bumper sticker)
Pamplona or Bust

Best of Kaptain Krude
The only good things to come out of Texas are steers and queers. Which one are yo.., oh. Never mind.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
You're going to fast.
Are we there yet?
When can we stop for some alfalfa?
I need to tinkle.
You're going to slow.
Are we there yet?
We shoulda turned left back there.
Driver Thawtbubble: Soon I can haz hamburger.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Putting a modern spin on the Paul Bunyan and Blue Ox legend did nothing good for NBC's ratings.

20 comments:

chronos the wonder pig said...

Gov't Motors unveiled it's new "green" ObamaCar...they are still working on the "brown" problem.

Submariner said...

Moooo-ooooveOn.com




Oh shut up, someone had to submit it.

Submariner said...

Gyllenhaal takes a horny ba$tard to Brokeback Mountain...

Submariner said...

ORA

I'm gonna go home and punch your momma in da mouf; they is NO way you are the fruit of my loins...

Submariner said...

Later, Bessie would find out why they call them "cow pokes..."

Submariner said...

One thing his guests could count on, Larry only served the freshest beef at his cook outs.

Rodney Dill said...

Actually its a lot more like brown poopon than grey.

dadoctah said...

Beef: it's not only what's for dinner, it's a way to use the carpool lane.

dadoctah said...

Where minotaurs come from: Southwestern edition.

Rodney Dill said...

In Texas, Coward ain't being chicken, its just a direction.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Car 12 to Dispatch... know how I'm always coming across real screwballs?
Yup, Sam, you sure have the knack!
Well, git ready to upload my dashcam to Youtube cause this'uns a doozy!

-OR-

In response to Obamalama's ridiculous lawsuit, Arizona put Patrolman George Minton's dashcam into evidence to refute "profiling" allegations.

-OR-

Candid Camera timed the prank on Central Valley Auto Detailing's $19.99 "We'll Make Any Car Like New!" offer perfectly. The laxatives kicked in right on schedule.

Submariner said...

Rosie O's limo is a bit out of the norm, but what the heck, it get's the job done.

Rodney Dill said...

Frankly I don't like the Taurus for that model year.

Rodney Dill said...

I wish I knew how to quit you.

GregMan said...

Yet another H1-B goes to work at IBM.

Rodney Dill said...

(Bumper sticker)
Pamplona or Bust

Rodney Dill said...

Ticketed for failing to moo to the right.

Kaptain Krude said...

The only good things to come out of Texas are steers and queers. Which one are yo.., oh. Never mind.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

You're going to fast.
Are we there yet?
When can we stop for some alfalfa?
I need to tinkle.
You're going to slow.
Are we there yet?
We shoulda turned left back there.

Driver Thawtbubble: Soon I can haz hamburger.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Putting a modern spin on the Paul Bunyan and Blue Ox legend did nothing good for NBC's ratings.