Tuesday, March 19, 2013

A Twink Who's Outstanding in His Field



1. "I just pooped a turd THIS big."

2. Ang Lee shoots his first "Wheat Thins" commercial.

3. Irreparably Traumatized by what he saw in the Executive Washroom, a former State Department intern is confined to a sanatorium in Kansas, where he can only communicate in grunts and gestures.

4. "He's got the whole world... in his hands... he's got the whole wide world, in his hands.."

5. How to tell if the farmer next door is ghey; this is his scarecrow.



Best of Double the U
Corn hole? No let me explain grains to you.

Best of Dactyl
In a modern re-telling of the classic Edgar Rice Burroughs tale, Mayor and Mrs. John Clayton of Greystoke, Iowa perish while lost in a corn maze at the state fair, leaving behind their infant son, who is found and raised by gophers...

Best of prince of leaves
"'Triticum vulgare'? Sorry, I'm not into that kinky stuff, Sen. Reid."

Best of prince of leaves
Trevor minces through a grove of aspens in the SyFy Original P0rno Musical: "Attack of the 200-Foot Twink".

Best of Submariner
...and then Anderson Cooper woke up.

Best of Joshua
He's young, conservative, and from the Midwest. But, he's also open to new ideas and he's slightly gay. Please welcome our new guest blogger here at [conservative web site].

Best of Kaptain Krude
The hills are alive,
with the sound of twinkness...

21 comments:

Double the U said...

Corn hole? No let me explain grains to you.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

North Dakota Sex Ed 101
Crop circles come from children of the cornhole!

-OR-

ORA: MAMMY!

Carpe Phlogiston said...

After a sudden swarm of locusts picked the field and Elroy clean, the farmer decided to leave the bones as a sort of memorial.

chronos the wonder pig said...

his tramp stamp reads:
SLIDE UP
ASS
WITH CARE

Artfldgr said...

you got me
yes my name is Waldo

Artfldgr said...

For some reason, Bryans rendition of MAMMY in a wheat field didn't impress...

Artfldgr said...

"why does everyone keep calling me Twink?"

Joshua said...

In Ang Lee's "Field of Dreams" remake the line "If you build it, he will come" takes on a slightly different meaning.

Dactyl said...

In a modern re-telling of the classic Edgar Rice Burroughs tale, Mayor and Mrs. John Clayton of Greystoke, Iowa perish while lost in a corn maze at the state fair, leaving behind their infant son, who is found and raised by gophers...

prince of leaves said...

"Gladheatehim" received rave reviews and runaway pr0n box office success...until Ridley Scott sued for copyright infringement.

prince of leaves said...

"'Triticum vulgare'? Sorry, I'm not into that kinky stuff, Sen. Reid."

prince of leaves said...

Trevor minces through a grove of aspens in the SyFy Original P0rno Musical: "Attack of the 200-Foot Twink".

Submariner said...

yada, yada, Kobe, yada, open...

Submariner said...

Bet AoM just developed an interest in farming, or at least plowing furrows.

Submariner said...

This will all be yours someday son. That is;
unless al'Gore is right and global warming incinerates us all into cinders in 2015...

Submariner said...

...and then Anderson Cooper woke up.

Submariner said...

Ang Lee remaking "The Hobbit" already?

Joshua said...

He's young, conservative, and from the Midwest. But, he's also open to new ideas and he's slightly gay. Please welcome our new guest blogger here at [conservative web site].

Kaptain Krude said...

The hills are alive,
with the sound of twinkness...

Submariner said...

"And when the sequester causes the crops to fail, nothing but prairie dogs popping their little heads out of their holes! Hmmmmm...
That gives me an idea you might like, Senator Reid..."

jimmy said...

Dumb Twink! I told you I was feeling my OATS.