1. The Day M'Chel's girdle finally snapped.
2. Children enjoyed throwing tomatoes at her, just to watch them go into orbit.
3. Bloated, useless, and getting bigger every day, but enough about the Government.
4. Technically, she's one beef-and-bean burrito away from being designate a Weapon of Mass Destruction
5. The kind of woman who wonders why bacon doesn't come in packages for two people.
Best of blue
...and she has the middle seat next to you on your next flight.
Best of Double the U
"Oh, did you bring the celery?" She asked.
Best of metalgarth
Alternate reality 25678: BET bought the rights to remake "Return of the Jedi"
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Fortunately, Cottonelle's Superbowl commercial aired during the power blackout, dramatically reducing the number of viewers who went blind.
Somewhere, deep within the folds of blubber, an Obamaphone is screaming for it's life.
Best of prince of leaves
Where will YOU be when your laxative never kicks in?
Best of Spineless Vertebrae
Even Sir Mix-a-Lot has his limits.
Best of Kaptain Krude
"Okay, you've convinced us, Mr. Peterson. Your new chair design IS the strongest one I've ever seen in my whole life!" The head of Jacobson's Furniture Depot knew right then that he was going to be a very, very rich man.