Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Keyboard Jockey (RACIST!!!!!)



1. "Let's see if I can reprogram all the nukes to hit red states."
2. ORA: "And the password to the nation's nuclear arsenal... 1-2-3-4, same as my luggage."
3. "Prove I'm not a robot... d-u-u-u-u-u-d-e, like, how can any of us prove we're not robots?"
4. (Typing and speaking at the same time). "Hot... profile... dude... Got... Pics??"
5. "This Nigerian Prince could be the answer to all our budget problems."
6. "Dear Diary, walked in on Biden sitting backwards on the toilet again. OMG, that guy makes 'Dumb and Dumber' look like 'Frasier.'..."

Best of Acebook: 


Best of Moron Shannon: Google image "funny Michelle Obama wookie gifs"

Best of Unclefacts Meteor-Summoner Dear Diary: "Today I had my first debate with Mitt. Not since my heady days away at school have I been handled by a man in such a thrilling manner."

Best of Moron Frank: "Hello, I am Barack Hussein Obama, stepson to Kenyan errrrr... Nigerian leader Sani Abacha. My father secreted $129 Million dollars in an account. If you will supply your bank information (no need for a CVV), we can transfer these funds after January 30th..."

Best of Moron Dan: tap... tap... resumemaker.net... tap tap tap... Qualifications Summary: Highly m̶o̶t̶i̶v̶a̶t̶e̶d̶ ... tap... shit.

Best of Moron Laree Hello friend I am a Nigerian Prince and if you send me your bank account number I will deposit 1 million dollars into your bank account LOL!

Best of Moron Colin: Off to Urban Dictionary to look up the meaning of "SCOAMF"

Best of Moron: Terry Anne Fisher Man. This is harder than it looks. Maybe I shouldn't have had others write and type my papers through school.

Best of Moron Shannon: Anyone know how I can delete this "HELP ME" email from ambassador Stevens????

Best of Moron Colin "Hey look! If I send my campaign $3 I get a chance to have lunch with me!"

Best of Moron Terry: Mr President! I believe we've found the perfect photo of you, where your limp wrist isn't showing!

Best of Moron Stephen: More dead troops, huh? This'll only take a minute... let's see... Mailings... Start Mail Merge? No, form letter's already written. Select Recipients? That must be the one...

17 comments:

Double the U said...

I am going to type every word I know.

metalgarth said...

I do not look like Carl. Time for the attorney general to pay 'metalgarth' a visit.

dadoctah said...

"Will somebody *PLEASE* get this damn cat a cheezburger?"

Dr. Doom said...

"Trust me Dub that woman is NOT fat", typed the President...

Dr. Doom said...

The attempt to reconfigure a laptop to work as a teleprompter for the next debate failed miserably when the President tried to order some hookers for his security detail on it...

Dr. Doom said...

While attempting to order pizzas for his campaign staff, the president inadvertently ordered a nuclear strike on Tehran. Crisis averted...

Dr. Doom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dr. Doom said...

"Let's see what the monors over at Caption This are up to today. I can't get enough of Ghey Tuesday and that eatin' shovel bit never fails to crack me up", thought the President.

Dr. Doom said...

The Term Paper Spammer revealed...

Submariner said...

Dear Penthouse, I never believed your letters until the day I met a Wookie of a woman...

Submariner said...

Dear Frank Marshall Davis,
I miss you soooooo much...

Submariner said...

Dear DNC,

Oopsy!

Submariner said...

"...and that's why you should give me another term."

That ought to be good enough for a debate with Romney... Now to get this in the mail before 4 pm...

Spineless Vertebrae said...

"Whoa, hot babes in my area want to meet up with me to have some 'fun'. All I have to do is give them my credit card information, sweet deal!"

Spin said...

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Sinclair:

You don't know me but this morning I may have given you a grandchild. I had read that childbirth was painful but OMG...

Spin said...

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Robinson:

Your daughter has been having her way with me for quite some time now and this morning I may have...

Dr. Doom said...

@SV except it is the taxpayer's credit card he always uses...