Tuesday, September 04, 2012

O Face

Shayne

1. After Tingles finished with his passionate endorsement of Obana, the response was unanimous: "I'll have what she's having." 

2. "And the Republican Party is nothing but racists and liars! I didn't see even one minority speaker at their convention! Not one!" 

3. "President Obama made a promise, and then he broke his promise... which means that Paul Ryan is a liar." 

4."I can't do it. I just can't do it. (Sob) I'm just not Gavin Newsom." 

5. Desperate to get Barack's attention and affections, Chris Matthews does his best impression of an angry black woman. 

Best of GregMan
Tingles does his best impression of a spoiled two-year-old brat. Sadly, no one notices the difference.

Best of metalgarth
...and Lucy kept pulling that football away, then the little red haired girl moved away, and my team never won a baseball game, my dog is 100x more popular than me, everyone calls me a Blockhead, I lost the spelling bee...

Best ofKaptain Krude
*insert sound of baby crying here*

Best ofDr. Doom
"This podium will never do", cried Mr. Matthews, "It is clear and everyone will see me!!!"

Best of prince of leaves
It wasn't hearing the story of Matthews' very personal one-on-one interview with the President in the pantry off the Oval Office that made the attendees queasy, it was the facial expressions and hand gestures he used in the telling.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
There are worse things than being stuck in an elevator for an hour listening to Celine Dion sing "My Heart Will Go On" over and over and over. Chris Matthews or William Shatner singing it, fer instance.

Best of Cat Whisperer
After wandering through an empty MSNBC studio for hours, it suddenly dawns on Chris Matthews that all of the other news anchors have gone to Charlotte, N.C. and he was left HOME ALONE.

11 comments:

GregMan said...

Tingles does his best impression of a whinet, spoiled two-year-old. Sadly, no one notices the difference.

metalgarth said...

...and Lucy kept pulling that football away, then the little red haired girl moved away, and my team never won a baseball game, my dog is 100x more popular than me, everyone calls me a Blockhead, I lost the spelling bee...

Kaptain Krude said...

*insert sound of baby crying here*

Dr. Doom said...

"This podium will never do", cried Mr. Matthews, "It is clear and everyone will see me!!!"

prince of leaves said...

It wasn't hearing the story of Matthews' very personal one-on-one interview with the President in the pantry off the Oval Office that made the attendees queasy, it was the facial expressions and hand gestures he used in the telling.

prince of leaves said...

"Please, Mr. President??? Look here, I took my dentures out and everything!

Carpe Phlogiston said...

I want my MAYPO!!
ORA for those younger than about 80

-OR-

There are worse things than being stuck in an elevator for an hour listening to Celine Dion sing "My Heart Will Go On" over and over and over. Chris Matthews or William Shatner singing it, fer instance.

-OR-

Now available, the Best of Chris Matthews video. The clip where Obamalama's stalking rat runs across Chris' feet at the podium is priceless.

Cat Whisperer said...

After wandering through an empty MSNBC studio for hours, it suddenly dawns on Chris Matthews that all of the other news anchors have gone to Charlotte, N.C. and he was left HOME ALONE.

Jack Reacher said...

Matthews' microphone feed was cut when it became clear he intended to sing "That Old Black Magic" in its entirety.

Dactyl said...

ATTICA! ATTICA!

Great Achilles Ghost said...

Chris Matthews recreates his most recent bathhouse adventure.