Tuesday, July 31, 2012

It Wouldn't Be Tuesday Without a Queen



1. The Queen was outraged. (ORA) "What is this? A venue for ants? How can the athletes be expected to compete... if they can't fit inside the building. It would have to be at least... three times bigger."

2. "And here we see the Olympic Mosque your, um, son insisted upon."

3. "And here is the outdoor auditorium where the surviving sex pistols are reuniting to perform 'God Save the Queen.'" Cool, huh?

4. "And here is the Monument to Imperial Decline, symbolically located right next to the far more massive NHS Monument."

5. "And this, of course, is the Maximum Security Facility where Fergie, Camilla, and Harry will be safely kept out of public view until after the Games."

10 comments:

GregMan said...

ORA: "The last twenty feet of the corridor are heavily soundproofed."

jimmy said...

I know that ORA! :)

"And here, Your Majesty, is where the mushroom cloud will rise...majestically, if I may...and within days you will reclaim your rightful place as the sovereign over those rebellious American colonies."

curly said...

Her Majesty’s Royal Vexer casts his most ominous spell on the White House voodoo doll: “Four more years of Obama”.

curly said...

“…and MI5 agents will storm the north entrance to the Chick-Fil-A here.”

Cat Whisperer said...

The President and First Lady of the United States have sent you a gift celebrating your sixty years as Queen Regent. It’s a scale model of Invesco Field where Obama gave his acceptance speech in 2008.

Jack Reacher said...

"In response to comments by Mr. Romney, we've decided to encase the entire facility in glass."

Jack Reacher said...

"This hermetically sealed case contains the remains of England's private sector."

Submariner said...

Rumor has it that Sir Elton enjoyed the tour but wished he had worn the yellow sun dress instead of the blue suit and hat.

Dr. Doom said...

"And this is a scale model of the special house you ordered built for Camilla - complete with force fields of death, Your Highness", explained Lord Bottomley...

dadoctah said...

Against his better judgment, Montgomery Burns reveals his "impenetrable force shield over Springfield" scheme to Principal Skinner's mother.