Wednesday, June 06, 2012

This would be a better country with Twice as many open carriers and half as many cops


1. For some reason, Merlene never had trouble returning items without a receipt.
2. How to spot someone who won't be voting for the SCOAMF come November.
3. Who is more likely to get a sympathetic story in the New York Times? The armed, Christian, red state Wal Mart shopper above? Or, an Islamic terrorist who blows up a school full of Jewish children?
4. Michael Bloomberg's worst nightmare; yogurt and green onion potato chips. Also, he hates guns.
5. The Republican idea of a "strap on."



Best of metalgarth
Next person who tries to put me on "People of Walmart.com" will be the last.


Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Tsk Tsk Tsk. That SOB didn't restock my favorite high fiber bread again. Time to make an example of mister store manager.


Best of Whacko
Wanna bet Merlene can take 16 items through the 15 item limit check out lane?


Best of  Spineless Vertebra
"Why, they don't seem to have any donuts I like with the holes in the center. Oh I have the solution to that."


Threadwinner Rodney Dill
Revolver... I don't even know her.

13 comments:

GregMan said...

"I am gonna CAP the next &@$%!! zombie that comes after me!"

GregMan said...

"Sigh. Out of hollow-points again. Better get another raincheck."

metalgarth said...

Next person who tries to put me on "People of Walmart.com" will be the last.

Julie the Jarhead said...

No caption ... I just really, really like this picture (though I'd prefer to carry a revolver).

Rodney Dill said...

nice gun rack

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Tsk Tsk Tsk. That SOB didn't restock my favorite high fiber bread again. Time to make an example of mister store manager.

-OR-

WTF? One brand's priced per ounce, another per slice?!? Who do I have to kill to get standardized unit pricing?

-OR-

Two hoodie-wearing gangbanger punks picked the wrong day to try to rob the Safeway. Film at 11.

-OR-

NRA touts benefits of a side arm:
a) people are happy to give you the last cart,
b) aisles are much less crowded, and
c) you pretty much always get to be first in the check-out line.

dadoctah said...

Coupon Suzy has really let herself go.

Kaptain Krude said...

"When I tell Ray Bradbury to f*** me, he's bloody well going to f*** me. Maybe some English muffins to break the ice?"


In memory of Ray Bradbury. Rest easy, giant.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Aye, Kap'n, 'twas a moment of silence shared here. The roster of those now gone who had a profound impact on me continues to grow. My fav Bradburysms:

~ If you enjoy living, it is not difficult to keep the sense of wonder.
~ Really knowing is good. Not knowing, or refusing to know, is bad, or amoral, at least.
~ I don’t try to describe the future. I try to prevent it.
~ You don’t have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them.

Whacko said...

Wanna bet Merlene can take 16 items through the 15 item limit check out lane?

JohnS1959 said...

"Lets see...
Hot dogs.......... check
buns.............. check
chili............. check
chips............. check
hydra shok ammo... check", noted Alice, "Looks like we are ready for the Wasilla Memorial Day Picnic..."

Spineless Vertebra said...

"Why, they don't seem to have any donuts I like with the holes in the center. Oh I have the solution to that."

Rodney Dill said...

Revolver... I don't even know her.