Monday, June 11, 2012
Mannequin 5: "Doing Fine"
1. Ever since Abercrombie and Felch installed their new mannequins, sales are "doing fine" (i.e., down 99%).
2. Madame Tuassaud's had to sell it because people kept spitting on it.
3. "How much for the sex doll in the window?" Chris Matthews demanded. "Here, I am handing you a blank check. Write any amount you want on it."
4. And then they activated Dr. Soong's prototype android and it flew the Enterprise directly into the sun while insisting the ship was "doing fine."
5. Is it just me, or does the firm gaze of this dummy convey more intelligence and strength than the actual SCOAMF?
Best of Rodney Dill
Live long and grow a pair.
Best of Submariner
I am finally proud of this department store.
Best of HLam
Finally a laser-like focus!
Best of Spineless Vertebra
The SCOAMF was honored to be a mannequin for a popular clothing department store. Until he realized how patriotic American Eagle sounded.
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
The People of Wal-Mart photos are getting downright creepy.
Best of JohnS1959
In later years psychologists would refer to the condition as Post Teleprompter Stress Disorder...
Best of Dr. Doom
For his next project, Justin Halpern penned, I suck at Government. It will be packaged with a life sized doll...
Best of joshua
The wax museum really nailed it with their Obama "the early years". They even made him look stoned.
Best of Spin
The Trayvon Collection only at Target.
Best of GregMan
The only problem is they have to keep peeling MSNBC reporters off of it.
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22 comments:
That is no mannequin, that is every American citizen in ten years after they were more interested in how cool their latest gadgets were instead of paying attention to what their government is doing.
Live long and grow a pair.
I saw this same mannequin at Gander Mountain. It was next to the white tails in the archery practice targets section...
Must be an Affirmative Action program; there's no way he's qualified for the job.
I believe I'd vote for 4 more years of this employment. Maybe 8...
I am finally proud of this department store.
Must be an outlet mall; no way ANY one's paying full price for THAT!
Finally a laser-like focus!
Stacy and Clinton do not approve.
The SCOAMF was honored to be a mannequin for a popular clothing department store. Until he realized how patriotic American Eagle sounded.
Thawtbubble: If I had a little boynequinn, he'd look just like Obamalama.
-OR-
Thawtbubble: WTF, I wanted to wear the hoodie!
-OR-
Stamped on his butt: Made in Indonesia
-OR-
The People of Wal-Mart photos are getting downright creepy.
In later years psychologists would refer to the condition as Post Teleprompter Stress Disorder...
For his next project, Justin Halpern penned, I suck at Government. It will be packaged with a life sized doll...
Where da white women manikins at?
The wax museum really nailed it with their Obama "the early years". They even made him look stoned.
The Trayvon Collection only at Target.
Yes! We ManiCAN
-or-
ManiCAN't
Actually, this one works for Tuesdays too.
The only problem is they have to keep peeling MSNBC reporters off of it.
The Republican health care plan is to cut payments to doctors so low they'll have to pad their bills by wandering dept stores diagnosing jaundice in mannequins.
"And this fine specimen is from the George Soros collection", intoned the wax museum tour guide...
"...and the number one reason that mannequin President is better than the real President", quipped Mr. Letterman, "No bowing!"
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