1. AC/DC concedes.
2. ORA: Some guys will do anything for medicinal cannabis.
3. "Ask Obama a tough question at a press conference? Hell, not even my balls are that big."
4. "Las Vegas police announced a break today in their search for the serial killer known as 'the Teabag Suffocator.'"
5. Now that the trial is over, Roger Clemens looses his truss.