Inside the TSA Training Academy- After implementing a series of politically correct, grade-on-a-curve, leave no one behind, teach to the test policies, Janet Napolitano could truthfully report that the recruits were able to find every carefully hidden box cutter.
-OR-
India's Transportation Safety Dept. never has a problem finding crash dummies for their overloaded train impact tests.
-OR-
Ow! My apologies. Well, watch that thing! Oooch! Point it downwards! Eeek! You dolt, that's my good toe! Sorry Sahib. Gaaa! Stop waving that around! Whoops! There goes my last finger... I'm all thumbs today. Typical commuter conversation on the Anandpur Shuttle.
These subjects were allowed on the plane without screening because (choose the best answer): a) Profiling them as potential terrorists would be culturally insensitive. b) Their religious emblems are permissible carry on items. c) They claimed to be undercover Justice Department operatives. d) None of them are attractive females.
TSA undercover infiltrators display the dangerous weapons they were able to smuggle in via their rectums. Janet Napolitano instituted mandatory body cavity searches for all travelers the following day.
10 comments:
The hard part is getting the enemy to line up beside the tracks; other than that the "Commuter Express Charge" is a great tactic.
--OR--
"Don't you know we're riding
On the Gurdwara Express..."
--OR--
Oddly enough, this is not considered going off the rails on a crazy train in the Pujab.
The Fashion Police will never take them alive.
Inside the TSA Training Academy-
After implementing a series of politically correct, grade-on-a-curve, leave no one behind, teach to the test policies, Janet Napolitano could truthfully report that the recruits were able to find every carefully hidden box cutter.
-OR-
India's Transportation Safety Dept. never has a problem finding crash dummies for their overloaded train impact tests.
-OR-
Ow!
My apologies.
Well, watch that thing!
Oooch! Point it downwards!
Eeek! You dolt, that's my good toe!
Sorry Sahib.
Gaaa! Stop waving that around!
Whoops! There goes my last finger... I'm all thumbs today.
Typical commuter conversation on the Anandpur Shuttle.
Mom! He's touching me.
HASSAN CHOP!
"Drink up Shriners!"
Nine out of ten Sikhs agree: Not shaving keeps their blades nice and sharp.
-OR-
The Al Sharpton Underground Railroad rolls into Florida ready to incite another mob.
TSA Agent Final Exam:
These subjects were allowed on the plane without screening because (choose the best answer):
a) Profiling them as potential terrorists would be culturally insensitive.
b) Their religious emblems are permissible carry on items.
c) They claimed to be undercover Justice Department operatives.
d) None of them are attractive females.
TSA undercover infiltrators display the dangerous weapons they were able to smuggle in via their rectums. Janet Napolitano instituted mandatory body cavity searches for all travelers the following day.
It baffles me. Sikh trains are NEVER hijacked, even though everyone on board is carrying a long, sharp kirpan!
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