Friday, March 09, 2012

Chalk Faced Whoresluts.


1. I'm sorry, I just think Russian newscasts are weird.

2. In a last ditch effort to save his candidacy, Ron Paul unleashes his fembots.

3. The Oxygen Network's remake of Charlie's Angels was severely disappointing.

4. Obama's Death Panelists model their snappy new uniforms.

5. Real Housewives of the Empire,coming this fall on the Death Star Channel.

Best of Double the U
We came from across the galaxy for our free birth control and to prosecute Rush Limbaugh.

Best of prince of leaves
Tired of criticism that their alien races differed only in their forehead prostheses, ST:NG makeup artists experimented with grotesque overbites instead.

Best of prince of leaves
#OccupyRisa reacts to Commander Riker beaming in to negotiate.

Best of Steve O
The "Snatch Team" from planet Lezbo are shocked and disappointed to see that they accidentally captured "Hillary Clinton" when they were trying for "Hillary Duff."

Best of jimmy
The ladies react to the return of the re-animated corpse of their nemesis Abby Cunningham, tonight on "Knots Landing In Space".

Best ofKaptain Krude
"The new Sybians are here!"

Best ofdadoctah
Feh. Flo from Progressive can kick all three of their asses with her eyes closed.

Best of Uchuck the Tuchuck
Ever wondered about the aliens' reaction to what they find when giving a redneck an anal probe? Now you know.

Best of blue
OK girls, set phasors on vibrate.....

Best of GregMan
Even though they had been warned, the new member's of Hillary's Palace Guard were shocked by the size of her clenis.

Best of Vinneh
"We have intercepted transmissions of We the People and have travelled across many galaxies to worship a woman named Allred. Where may we find this sage"?

30 comments:

Double the U said...

We came from across the galaxy for our free birth control and to prosecute Rush Limbaugh.

prince of leaves said...

2016: in the Gender Justice League's secret undersea command post, Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, Sandra Fluke, and Randi Rhodes anxiously watch the live satellite feed from the assault on Rush Limbaugh's heavily-fortified Florida compound.

[WV: escry slatern - indeed!]

Spineless Vertebrae said...

Dr. Evil's Fembots just aren't what they used to be.

prince of leaves said...

Tired of criticism that their alien races differed only in their forehead prostheses, ST:NG makeup artists experimented with grotesque overbites instead.

Spineless Vertebrae said...

Wasn't trying to steal from you, V, I didn't fully read your captions before I posted mine.

prince of leaves said...

Stargate's Lucian Alliance was created after the initial concept for a "Lysistratan Alliance" tested poorly with focus groups.

prince of leaves said...

#OccupyRisa reacts to Commander Riker beaming in to negotiate.

Steve O said...

The "Snatch Team" from planet Lezbo are shocked and disappointed to see that they accidentally captured "Hillary Clinton" when they were trying for "Hillary Duff."

jimmy said...

The ladies react to the return of the re-animated corpse of their nemesis Abby Cunningham, tonight on "Knots Landing In Space".

Kaptain Krude said...

"Raquel Welch is guest-starring on Sunday's CSI? OOOOooo"

Kaptain Krude said...

"The new Sybians are here!"

Spin said...

The emissaries from the Chlamydia Collective have arrived.

dadoctah said...

Feh. Flo from Progressive can kick all three of their asses with her eyes closed.

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

Ever wondered about the aliens' reaction to what they find when giving a redneck an anal probe? Now you know.

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

As per FemFleet Regulation 9127.445, officers above the rank of commander are not required to show cleavage.

Dr. Doom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dr. Doom said...

Captain's Log Stardate 41135.7:

We beamed down to witness the Assimilation of the Grand Vizier of the Planet Viagra. Lost six red-shirt crewmen. Fortunately their deaths were not entirely unpleasant...

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Budget conscious FOX dropped Fringe in favor of having walking cadaver Martin Landau and a surprisingly lifelike Barbara Bain - middle female - reprise their roles in Moonbase Alpha. Landau was willing to work for cigarettes, Bain for daily sheep placenta infusions.

-OR-

The set of the Star Trek remake was so realistic, the actress on the left suffered severe motion sickness before they even hit Warp 1.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Accompanied by the Gilligan's Island theme, SNL's sci fi comedy skit "I Can See Russia from Here!" with Sarah Palin as a bumbling first mate who crashed spaceship Minnow onto a desert planet pretty much ensured she would never be electable.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Thawtbubble as they look in the rear view mirror screen: Oh no, we ran over a cute little space bunny!

-OR-

Beth, a little more to the left, er I mean port, no starboard, no port.
Give it some gas, Mable.
Stop! Stop! Back up a bit.
Yep, even in the year 2591, women still can't parallel park.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

The all-female crew picked up old radio signals from distant Earth and could not believe their ears. Some loon named Limbaugh, a member of what they guessed was the long-defunct MRS - mysogynist republican sect - was ranting about keeping women barefoot and pregnant.

Sweetie wanted equal time after reading my parallel parking caption.

Rodney Dill said...

Through the miracle of modern science Sandra Fluke has been cloned, unfortunately none were considered an improvement on the original.

blue said...

OK girls, set phasors on vibrate.....

GregMan said...

Even though they had been warned, the new member's of Hillary's Palace Guard were shocked by the size of her clenis.

Double the U said...

Worst Battlestar Galactica porn parody ever.

mega said...

"You won't be harmed. We only want Rush. Tell us where he is."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

@Double the U - whoa, I like! Imagine a young Anne Lockhart in a pr0n version... a foursome shower scene with the other Battlestar babes - Seymour, Spang and Jenson. Better yet, the ship goes back in time and they have an orgy with Charlie's Angels. Yeah, I can see this winning an Emmy.

Anonymous said...

"We have intercepted transmissions of We the People and have travelled across many galaxies to worship a woman named Allred. Where may we find this sage"?

Vinneh

dadoctah said...

Not a caption. I had to find out what movie this picture came from. Turns out it's from an first-season episode of Space:1999 called "The Last Enemy". I'm going to have to check it out again.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Wow, you really *can* see Obama's debt from out here!"








... and the sound of George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, et al weeping can also be heard in outer space.