Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Our Five-Thousandeth Post

Daily Caller via Jim "Mother May I Sleep with" Treacher


1. "Repeat with me, everyone. 'The Corps is Mother, The Corps is Father.' And don't pronounce it like that idiotic SCOAMF does."

2. Hillary's jazz hand sort of sucked, but her impression of Obama's retard face was spot-on.

3. "And in 2016, we will begin implanting health care tracking chips into the right hand of every citizen."

4. Hillary was only a tad surprised at the response to the question, 'Raise your hand if you have orally serviced a president of the United States."

5. This went way better than Hillary'slast trip to a Health Care Facility...

Best of Dactyl
After repeated washings, do your whites start to look drab and dingy?

Best of Spin
Five...FIVE...$5.00 foot-longs all month at Subway

Best of Passionate Conservative
This hand is used for pleasure...

Best of Cat Whisperer
Our Secretary of State greets the returning Heaven's Gate cultists aboard the mother ship.

Best of Jack Reacher
"Oh! They picked me! So I follow them to the top of the volcano, and then what happens?"

Best of Christopher Estep
The Obamacare Death Panel always opens its meetings by polling the members for how many empty hospital beds "created or saved" in the last week.

Best of dadoctah
Where da white pantsuit at?

Best of Submariner
Who thinks the bitch should iron shirts?

THreadwinner Mr Hankey
Logan 5...you are LONG past due time to enter Carousel.

Best of VInneh
Hillary mets with the medical team that will secretly castrate Bill during his annual check up.





25 comments:

Dr. Doom said...

The Ron Paul campaign works its magic chanting, "Resistance is futile, you will be assimilated..."

Dr. Doom said...

Current Events Test

The Secretary of State is seen here posing with a group of ________?

a) Death Panel rejects
b) Likely Obama voters
c) Post-operative lobotomy patients
d) both b and c

Dactyl said...

After repeated washings, do your whites start to look drab and dingy?

Spin said...

Five...FIVE...$5.00 foot-longs all month at Subway

Passionate Conservative said...

This hand is used for pleasure...

Rodney Dill said...

That happens to potato salad that's left too long in the refrigerator too.

Cat Whisperer said...

Our Secretary of State greets the returning Heaven's Gate cultists aboard the mother ship.

Jack Reacher said...

"Oh, it's the Chinese premier. We owe him money. Just wave and act casual."

Jack Reacher said...

"Oh! They picked me! So I follow them to the top of the volcano, and then what happens?"

Christopher Estep said...

Having to spend time with the plebs for the first time in 20 years, Hillary Clinton was amazed to learn that the rumors were true. M&M's really DO melt in your mouth and not in your hand!

Christopher Estep said...

The audio-animitronics for the upcoming Liberal-Land at Epcot were making progress, but technicians admitted that it was no where near realistic enough for the park.

Christopher Estep said...

The Obamacare Death Panel always opens its meetings by polling the members for how many empty hospital beds "created or saved" in the last week.

dadoctah said...

Where da white pantsuit at?

Submariner said...

Anyone up for a game of "Tax the Capitalist?"

Submariner said...

Who thinks the bitch should iron shirts?

Submariner said...

♫ One of these things is not like the others...♪

Submariner said...

The clueless and the uncoordinated never quite get the Vulcan salute right...

Submariner said...

Does anyone else hate it when we throw a telethon for Public TV and forget to install phones?

Matt the K said...

"Another Jonestown theme party!! You shouldn't have!!!"

Kaptain Krude said...

Five
FIVE little
Five little socialists

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Hillary sticks out like a sore thumb at an amputee convention.

WordVerify: ynabinda precksp
This new word captcha ain't giving me a damned thing to work with!

Mr Hankey said...

Logan 5...you are LONG past due time to enter Carousel.

Mr Hankey said...

"Simon Says....show us your sticky hand"

JohnS1959 said...

The PBS Remake of Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood was a dismal failure. No one could spell 'socialism', Hilary's choice of pants suit (in lieu of sweater) burned through three camera filters, and don't even ask about what happened when they covered the number five...

Anonymous said...

Hillary mets with the medical team that will secretly castrate Bill during his annual check up.

Vinneh