Daily Caller via Jim "Mother May I Sleep with" Treacher
1. "Repeat with me, everyone. 'The Corps is Mother, The Corps is Father.' And don't pronounce it like that idiotic SCOAMF does."
2. Hillary's jazz hand sort of sucked, but her impression of Obama's retard face was spot-on.
3. "And in 2016, we will begin implanting health care tracking chips into the right hand of every citizen."
4. Hillary was only a tad surprised at the response to the question, 'Raise your hand if you have orally serviced a president of the United States."
5. This went way better than Hillary'slast trip to a Health Care Facility...
Best of Dactyl
After repeated washings, do your whites start to look drab and dingy?
Best of Spin
Five...FIVE...$5.00 foot-longs all month at Subway
Best of Passionate Conservative
This hand is used for pleasure...
Best of Cat Whisperer
Our Secretary of State greets the returning Heaven's Gate cultists aboard the mother ship.
Best of Jack Reacher
"Oh! They picked me! So I follow them to the top of the volcano, and then what happens?"
Best of Christopher Estep
The Obamacare Death Panel always opens its meetings by polling the members for how many empty hospital beds "created or saved" in the last week.
Best of dadoctah
Where da white pantsuit at?
Best of Submariner
Who thinks the bitch should iron shirts?
THreadwinner Mr Hankey
Logan 5...you are LONG past due time to enter Carousel.
Best of VInneh
Hillary mets with the medical team that will secretly castrate Bill during his annual check up.