Monday, January 16, 2012

The Shoes of the Flipperman


1. "Barney Frank is so out-of-touch he thinks 'Skyrim' is a way to join the Mile High Club. Heh! Betcha never thought a Mormon could tell such a filthy, filthy joke."

2. "I love to fire people. I'm starting with everybody at the TSA."

3.  Al Gore points and laughs from the window of his private jet. "LOSER!"

4. "Nice... Bruno Magli shoes... Holy sh-t! You're the real killer!"

5. "Wow! Mr. Romney. I've never seen anyone's hair stay in place while standing in hot jet wash."

Best of Double the U
Sometimes you little people do a really nice job of helping us important people out.

Best of GregMan
"Good job on the shoes, Ambassador Huntsman. Now go tell Santorum to get over here and give me my manicure."

Best of Dr. Doom
Entry 3458 on the list of jobs Mr. Obama is unqualified to perform...

Best of curly
No one kisses your ass like Rectum Airline.

Best of JohnS1959
"Hey buddy", whispered Mitt, "any idea where I can get a dissertation sample?"

Best of curly
“Enough foreplay already! Let’s move on to the body cavity search.”

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
The DirectAir pilot - a Huntsman supporter - slowly turned the nose left and edged it forward until... SCHLORP Frannnng BzzzZZZzzz ... and that's how Mr. 1% missed the debate.

Best of Rodney Dill
"Yessir, sticky shoess is one of the side effects of flying ErectAir."

Best of mpur
Romney still trying to shake that elitist prick image, I see.

Best of dadoctah
While Robin pre-flights the batplane, Alfred gives Bruce Wayne a quick touch-up.

28 comments:

Double the U said...

Sometimes you little people do a really nice job of helping us important people out.

dissertation sample said...

Amazing post! Thanks a lot for it.

GregMan said...

After the economic recovery which followed the 2012 election, even former TSA staffers were able to find meaningful jobs.

GregMan said...

"Good job on the shoes, Ambassador Huntsman. Now go tell Santorum to get over here and give me my manicure."

GregMan said...

"Say, Governor Romney, can I tell you about Ron Paul?"

Dr. Doom said...

Etiquette 101:

When you greet the Pope you kiss his ring.

When you meet the Japanese Emperor, you bow respectfully.

When you meet the Mormon President you...

Dr. Doom said...

Entry 3458 on the list of jobs Mr. Obama is unqualified to perform...

curly said...

“It’s the LDS Church, not an LSD cult you idiot.”

curly said...

No one kisses your ass like Rectum Airline.

curly said...

“Wow! You have cloven hooves just like Obama, Hilary, Newt, Ben Bernanke, Timothy Geitner, …”

Jack Reacher said...

"Your luggage may not arrive with you, but your shoes will look spectacular while you search for it."

JohnS1959 said...

"Hey buddy", whispered Mitt, "any idea where I can get a dissertation sample?"

curly said...

“Enough foreplay already! Let’s move on to the body cavity search.”

jj said...

"Het Mitt, you got a chubby for me??"

jj said...

"Sorry Mr. Romney, the President is running a little late. He forgot to pick up the beer."

dadoctah said...

How come *he* gets to keep his shoes on at the airport?

Jack Reacher said...

"That takes care of the shoes. Now I need to check your hair, Sir."
"You're gonna need a bigger wand."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

The DirectAir pilot - a Huntsman supporter - slowly turned the nose left and edged it forward until... SCHLORP Frannnng BzzzZZZzzz ... and that's how Mr. 1% missed the debate.

-OR-

"I love the smell of fired people in the morning!"

-OR-

DirectAir was sold off in pieces all because the chair they provided wasn't an antique.

-OR-

Funny how elections are won or lost over little things: Riding in a tank, misspelling potato, choosing a flake from Alaska as running mate, sitting in a chair on the tarmac while a valet steam presses your socks.

Rodney Dill said...

"Yessir, sticky shoess is one of the side effects of flying ErectAir."

Rodney Dill said...

Romney: "Well what do you think the size of my feet say about me?"
Redcoat: (thinking) "Bozo."

mpur said...

Romney still trying to shake that elitist prick image, I see.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

C'mon, admit it, you ENVY me, dontcha boy?

-OR-

Sir, care to explain why the front 5 inches of your shoes are stuffed with rolled up socks?

-OR-

When I told Gingrich if he didn't shut up he'd be pulling my tax returns out of his butt, Bawney Fwank ran up on stage yelling that he'd help and proceeded to pants Newt!

-OR-

You're part of the 99%, right? You know I'm not tipping.

dadoctah said...

While Robin pre-flights the batplane, Alfred gives Bruce Wayne a quick touch-up.

Anonymous said...

"Put a good shine on it. I want to see the real reason Gingrich married Calista."

Vinneh

Submariner said...

GregMan said...
"Good job on the shoes, Ambassador Huntsman. Now go tell Santorum to get over here and give me my manicure."


...and have Bachman standing by for a lengthy task I have waiting for her, as well. Then tell Cain to go bring us some pizza's.

Submariner said...

Gov Perry looked perplexed: "Ah thought you resahned from head of Bain, Mitt. Why they still lettin ya use yer former plane?"

Submariner said...

When you get done with the other one, how about draftin me up a tax return to release to the public, Bernanke...

dub said...

Mittens thought bubble: "See, I'm just like the average citizen...I too get my shoes shined at the airport."