Shayne
1. George couldn't believe the Co-Op Board had let *another* giraffe move into the building. "This f--king place is going to hell," he muttered.
2. Suddenly, all the acacia leaves and Pabst Blue Ribbon bottles littering the hallway made sense. Hipster Giraffe's were moving into the building.
3. There was enough left in the Toys R Us trust fund to assure Geoffrey a midtown loft and plenty of cocaine and whores.
4. As trendy man-on-beast combinations grew ever more exotic, America was forced to concede that Rick Santorum had been right all along.
5. All George knew was, the next day, the giraffe was gone, and the "Moo Shu Pork" at Great Wall tasted a little gamey for the next month.

37 comments:
We may call it a giraffe, but in Enumclaw the beast is known as “Deepthroat”.
The press omitted photos and some of the more graphic testimony from Newt’s ex.
After exposing insider stock trading at Toys R Us, Geoffrey the Giraffe was forced into the Witness Protection Plan for his own safety.
"I guess someone finally figured out how to get the elephant into the refrigerator."
ORA
From the makers of "Man on a Ledge"....
Is that a Giraffe in you appartment, or are you just happy to see me?
-Oiao
Where da black wimmin at?
C'mon in off the ledge, Les. Nobody thinks you're ghey... besides, it's not Tuesday!
ORA ♩ ♫ WKRP in Cincinnati ♪ ♬
Word Verify: twograf - the count... if a second graf joins the one already at the window
David Attenborough whispers: More proof of global warming and worsening drought on the savannah - wildlife migrating to the cities just like the natives.
G: Oh, hi there David! Hot enough for you?
-OR-
Hey, you in 508, turn down that damn music!
I'm not ashamed to say it: Elwood P Dowd was a pansy!
wv: krjjbn. Guess I moved my vowels one time too many today.
"For the last time, no, I don't have any Grey Poupon."
great) liked everything very much) keep it up and dont stop)
The location? Fantastic.
The rent? Pretty damn good.
However John's Giraffobia and Altophobia got the best of him.
Hey look another Kenyan who is more qualified to be President than the one we have...
Well I see the quality of our spammers is improving...
@Doom, ran across an article a year or two back complaining that those sites are run by con artists who hire ringers (fat chainsmoking broads using Skype?) to tease nerds into paying to "upgrade." A sucker's born every minute. LMAO
WordVerify (this is a good one!): pronizen - ancient one-handed oriental meditation
Too big for a casting couch, Toys R Us spokesmodel and aspiring actor Geoffrey manages an awkward reading of Papillion's solitary confinement- "Hey, how do I look?"
@carpe, hopefully they are at least female...
I don't remember this episode of Batman. What did Adam and Burt say to Geoffrey?
So I says to 'em, I says "All you kids. get off my lawn!" And them young goats wouldn't. So I sells the house and gets this apartment. Problem solved. Why are ewe hear?
Do you think a Glock 9mm can reach this floor?
And with one look out the window, Japeth finally got why the base of Noah's new apartment complex was shaped like an ark, just as it started to rain...
"Waffles?!"
Gerry "the G" visits Maimi to meet with an undisclosed politician for the mascot position of a third party.
That man with the yellow hat is one kinky son-of-a-bitch.
"LOOK! A FIST!"
ORA
Geoffry and Mrs G thought moving to Park avenue they would finally find the privacy they have been searching for since their glory days working for Toys R Us
After they took away Antoine Yates Tiger in NY, he moved and decided on adopting a more docile beast
When Geoffrey left the jungle and signed those contracts, he never realized the paparazzi would follow him literally everywhere
This photograph appeared in Time magazines expose "Suicidal Giraffes..."
That day that Geoffrey looked out his window and saw that giraffe in the next building it was love at first sight...
John remained real angry at Keven for lining the Giraffe costume with cement...
Trying to avoid claims of mistreatment and lawsuits, Ringling Brothers decided to go out of their way when boarding animals in the future
Giraffes start Occupy New York to protest not getting the vote.
very interesting. as always))
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