Saturday, January 28, 2012

The Cure for Heterosexuality



1. The only legitimate caption for this is "Oh, Good Gracious Merciful God, No!"

2. Barney Frank prepares for his nuptials.

3. After finding this image, Andrew Sullivan stopped doing Google searches entirely.

4. Didn't you used to hate it when you brought friends over and your mom would openly flirt with them?

5. "She's supporting Gingrich." - The Romney Super-PAC reaches a new low in attack advertising.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
WOW, I never thought her fugliness could get any worse, but Mimi sure has let herself go!

Best of Dactyl
You uh, you went a little heavy on the eye makeup, Dad.

Best of Submariner
Tammy Faye practises to make Jim happy when he gets out...

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
TimeLife reports the discovery of a new, giant species of primate in an equatorial rainforest. Prof. Herman Glinksmelter writes, "The female's manhands suggest these are not tree dwellers, while the skin and hair around her eyes indicates she's part of the world's oldest profession. We're naming this: Gorilla charliesheenus"

Best of Rodney Dill
"OK, Just where the f*ck is Dian Fossey?"

Best of sonicfrog
I don't care what you say, she was still better than watching the SOTU address!

Best of jj
It has been rumored that Charlie Sheen has finally gotten clean and sober when he woke up after a night of booze, coke, and....

Best of VInneh
You can put lipstick on a gorilla,...

Best of Dr. Doom
The Obama economy (after application of lipstick)...

Best of jj
From her eHarmony.com profile...vivacious, adventitious female seeks male for a night of unbridled passion... "Unbridled" being the operative word, there.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
It turned my stomach to look at this photo again, but I was wondering... can a banana scream?

Best of curly
Soundly defeated by The Force, Jabba the Hutt moved to San Francisco and opened a deli.

25 comments:

Carpe Phlogiston said...

WOW, I never thought her fugliness could get any worse, but Mimi sure has let herself go!

-OR-

La Chupacabra Lives!

dadoctah said...

Aw, c'mon. *Nobody* needs potassium *that* bad!

Anonymous said...

"The Cure for Heterosexuality"
Are you sure that is female?

Whacko said...

Too bad that some things once seen, cannot be unseen. Pass the eye bleach please.

Dactyl said...

You uh, you went a little heavy on the eye makeup, Dad.

Submariner said...

Tammy Faye practises to make Jim happy when he gets out...

Submariner said...

Giving new meaning to "verdigris" daily.

Submariner said...

Smelly.Pirate.Hooker

Carpe Phlogiston said...

TimeLife reports the discovery of a new, giant species of primate in an equatorial rainforest. Prof. Herman Glinksmelter writes, "The female's manhands suggest these are not tree dwellers, while the skin and hair around her eyes indicates she's part of the world's oldest profession. We're naming this: Gorilla charliesheenus"

Anonymous said...

I just gota ask. So, where has that bananna been?

-Oiao

Rodney Dill said...

"OK, Just where the f*ck is Dian Fossey?"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Tawanya Washington tweets to friends: Heya, me gots a job as a Brazilian Bikini Model!!
Dub quickly calls travel agent to cancel his vacation.

Anonymous said...

MY EYES!!!!!!!MY EYES!!!!!!!

sonicfrog said...

I don't care what you say, she was still better than watching the SOTU address!

jj said...

From her eHarmony.com profile...vivacious, adventitious female seeks male for a night of unbridled passion...

jj said...

It has been rumored that Charlie Sheen has finally gotten clean and sober when he woke up after a night of booze, coke, and....

Anonymous said...

You can put lipstick on a gorilla,...

Vinneh

Dr. Doom said...

The Obama economy (after application of lipstick)...

Kaptain Krude said...

jj said...
From her eHarmony.com profile...vivacious, adventitious female seeks male for a night of unbridled passion...

"Unbridled" being the operative word, there.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

It turned my stomach to look at this photo again, but I was wondering... can a banana scream?


WordVerify is reading my mind!!: squeler

Carpe Phlogiston said...

One of the chronically unemployed unless Barnum & Bailey makes a comeback. According to Ureathra's resume, her sole talent is that she "gives good banana."

curly said...

Soundly defeated by The Force, Jabba the Hutt moved to San Francisco and opened a deli.

curly said...

“I’m voting for Barack Obama…as soon as I finish fellating my banana.”

curly said...

Up next on “Metaphor TV”: Too Big To Fail banks devour our banana republic.

curly said...

“Kobe, I’m…errp!...open.”