Monday, November 07, 2011

Der


1. "All right, Mr. Soros, if you insist. 'De Camptown ladies sing this song, doo-dah! doo-dah!"

2. INVISBLE DEFICIT REDUKCHUN PLAN

3. "And I am confident that with my new, angry white policy advisor, we will soon know exactly where the white women are at."

4. The main thing Obama's rendition of "I Got Rhythm" demonstrated was that he didn't.

5. Standard Cap #446: "He's got the whole world.. (clap) ... in his hands... C'mon, what are you people, uptight or something."

Best of blue
"..and a want to announce that I have appointed Jerry Sandusky as my children's safe sex czar!"

Best of USMC2841
Daschle wonders how Obama's ass doesn't get jealous of the amount of crap that flows from his mouth.

Best of Unscrupulous
While BO's audience may have needed overly animated hand gestures to understand the meaning behind "silent but deadly"... Daschle didn't. He knew right off.

Best of Oiao
Photo of Obama explaing Macro and Micro Economics.... Nah! Just him explaining the cheese fry portion sizes that Mich'hell eats daily.

Best of Unscrup[ulous
What attracted me to M'Chelle? We'll, when I met her it was this big! I mean they, they were this long. Big. This big.

Best of GregMan
"I swear, Frank Marshall Davis stuck in this far in! Man, did I need a butt closure after that!"

Best of Jack Reacher
"Is the country in good hands? Hey, man, I'm not Allstate. You takes your chances."

Best of metalgarth
And Prinicipal Skinner just watches Carl drone on in the school library for 30 minutes solid. The sad thing is that this was one of the better Simpson's episodes of the last decade.

28 comments:

blue said...

"..and a want to announce that I have appointed Jerry Sandusky as my children's safe sex czar!"

blue said...

'..and I want to deny the rumors that Justin Beiber is the father of Sasha's baby."

blue\ said...

"Boy, that Calista Gingrich is hot, isn't she!"

USMC2841 said...

Daschle wonders how Obama's ass doesn't get jealous of the amount of crap that flows from his mouth.

jj said...

"....and the cheeseburger was this big! And dammed if that Secret Service Agent didn't warn me that m'chelle was coming. He's now guarding a bank lobby in Nome, Alaska."

dub said...

Kobe, I'm open!

Chronos the Wonder Pig said...

"I am here to announce that M'Chel was sexually harassed by Herman Cain and that I watched. Now vote for me!"

Unscrupulous said...

While BO's audience may have needed overly animated hand gestures to understand the meaning behind "silent but deadly"... Daschle didn't. He knew right off.

Mr Hankey said...

Obama announces the upcoming Obama libray location will be at PS 222.

Anonymous said...

"I'm, um telling you now! Uh, if that Greens Keeper at Andrews AFB, ah, doesn't get his shit to, ah, gether, he will be needin a Butt Closure this big!"

-Oiao

Anonymous said...

Photo of Obama explaing Macro and Micro Economics.... Nah! Just him explaining the cheese fry portion sizes that Mich'hell eats daily.

-Oiao

Anonymous said...

Photo of Obama explaing Macro and Micro Economics.... Nah! Just him explaining the cheese fry portion sizes that Mich'hell eats daily.

-Oiao

Anonymous said...

Democratic Congress Critter's Thought Bubble: "We are so screwed in next year's elections1"

Unscrup[ulous said...

What attracted me to M'Chelle? We'll, when I met her it was this big! I mean they, they were this long. Big. This big.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

I've heard of "phoning it in" but Obamalama just has the Secret Service wheel a wax dummy around to various events... nobody can tell the difference.

-OR-

Do I favor Dewey Decimal or BISAC? Well, I think Dewey lost an election and BI-SAC sounds nice and liberal, so I'll go with BISAC. Why do you ask?

GregMan said...

"I swear, Frank Marshall Davis stuck in this far in! Man, did I need a butt closure after that!"

GregMan said...

"No, really, Hillary's is only this big! M'chel's is way bigger!"

GregMan said...

"My favorite book? Everybody Poops, of course. It gave me the inspiration for my economic policy!"

Dr. Doom said...

Drudge Developing:

The President announced today that he would hire a Soccer Czar and an Archery Czar to oversee HUD projects from now on. The move was taken to avoid further episodes of co-mingling these important sports. In other news, polls indicate that the vast majority of archery enthusiasts are Republican while most soccer players are Democrats...

Rodney Dill said...

Yes. In the garden, growth has it seasons. First comes spring and summer, but then we have fall and winter. And then we get spring and summer again.

Rodney Dill said...

I dropped the baby... I don't know why.

Jack Reacher said...

"Is the country in good hands? Hey, man, I'm not Allstate. You takes your chances."

Jack Reacher said...

"...'bout like this. You see, black men aren't really bigger; black women are smaller." ATDHE

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

"...and that is why I've ordered all these books replaced with copies of Das Kapital and Dreams of my Father."

Rodney Dill said...

Michelle: "Whatever you do Barry, don't drop my crystal vase."

metalgarth said...

And Prinicipal Skinner just watches Carl drone on in the school library for 30 minutes solid. The sad thing is that this was one of the better Simpson's episodes of the last decade.

Dactyl said...

I kid you not. Today, my very first drive, this far from the hole. This far! And you should have seen my second drive...

Dr. Doom said...

"...Consequently, we will be redistributing all of these non-linear differential equations textbooks to the remedial business math students because we stand with the 99%", announced Mr. Obama.