Monday, October 10, 2011

Pull My Finger


1. Governor Christie is overjoyed when the C-5 arrives with his lunch order.

2. "It's skywriting from Bill Kristol. It says, 'Declare and I will...' I'm afraid it gets rather filthy after that, Governor."

3. "Well, so much for Air Force 1. Guess we know what happened to those Libyan missiles now. So, how 'bout some lunch. Red Robin, anybody?"

4. Standard Caption #8: "Aiyeeee,,, Gojira!"

5. "Hey, look, the Goodrich blimp," said the Governor, who loved giving his aides an ORA every once in a while.

Best of Jack Reacher
"Well, Governor, I guess it would be cool, as you say, if the sandwiches on the Subway billboard were real."

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
The judge declared all upskirts taken during the attack of the 50-ft tall woman lawfully obtained, but asked counsel to send 8x10-ft glossies to his chambers for further "review."

Best of Unscrupulous
You were right sir. That hot air balloon just took off like a rocket when you stepped off of it. Well I'll be danged.

Best of Double the U
And there is NJ's biggest threat Sir, it is the stench cloud from the occupy Wall Street protesters.

Best of Submariner
Fuggly naked gal, third floor, second window from the right...

Best of GregMan
Here come the Germans to attack Pearl Harbor again!

Best of Rodney Dill
"It says, Surrender Dorothy"

Best of Dactyl
That cloud looks like a bunny, and that one looks like a Predator drone, and that one looks like a nice Philly cheesesteak. Say, you guys hungry? *Snort* look who I'm talking to, of course you are.

Best of Oiao
"Look! Its a Unicorn with flames coming out of its ass and loosing altitude! Is that a little black kid riding it? Nah, just Obama..."

Best of Vinneh
"Da plane! Da plane"!

Best of prince of leaves
"The top-secret ultrasound imagers we used are showing us that Hoffa is in the concrete of the upper deck, at the base of that light tower right there..."

Best of sifty
If you look really carefully you can see the top of Obama's deficit.

Best of JohnS1959
"Look there guys, if you stare into the sun and squint, you can see the last glimmer of hope for the economy as it dies of neglect", said Steve.

39 comments:

Jack Reacher said...

"Well, Governor, I guess it would be cool, as you say, if the sandwiches on the Subway billboard were real."

Jack Reacher said...

"Aaaannnd....there goes Dawn's head now."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Really? They used to be way up there? And where are Obamalama's ratings now? Ouch! That musta hurt.

-OR-

Look! There goes Bachmann now, on her broomstick!

-OR-

I'll be damned, there really is a 13th floor!

-OR-

The judge declared all upskirts taken during the attack of the 50-ft tall woman lawfully obtained, but asked counsel to send 8x10-ft glossies to his chambers for further "review."

Whacko said...

"Wow! That's the second largest statue of Marilyn Monroe I've ever seen!"

Unscrupulous said...

You were right sir. That hot air balloon just took off like a rocket when you stepped off of it. Well I'll be danged.

Anonymous said...

"Look! Air Force 1. Since when did Jersey become a 'Fly Over State'?"

-Oiao

Double the U said...

and there is NJ's biggest threat Sir, it is the stench cloud from the occupy Wall Street protesters.

term papers said...

hahah))) cool post!

Silhouette said...

"Damn, I can never read skywriting when it's white against a black background."

jj said...

Required Seinfeld reference....

I wanted to be one of the Woody Woodpecker baloon handlers in the Thanksgiving Day parade.

Aide whispering to Gov...."Uh, sir...it's Thanksgiving in Canada today...we still have another six weeks".

Submariner said...

Pink Floyd Reference;

Look, Govvie; there's an airplane over'ead...

Submariner said...

Obligatory SNL reference:

What IS that?

Submariner said...

Fuggly naked gal, third floor, second window from the right...

Submariner said...

OJA

She had blue eyes; one blew that way and one blew this way...

Submariner said...

And the patriot missile blasts off at mach 4 tracking incoming warh... uh, it shouldn't be turning around...

Dr. Doom said...

"Look fellas", shouted Colonel Jones, "Joe Biden is shooting off his mouth again!"

dadoctah said...

"I already *did* surrender! And my name's not Dorothy!"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Maybe it's an optical illusion caused by the dynamic pork rind eating duo in the foreground but the gal in back seems to have an amazingly swanlike neck. Just wondering who she is.

-OR-

With a $243,000 federal grant, Governor Christie finally gets an answer to a question that's bugged him for years... can turkeys fly?

-OR-

Speaking of...
It's just started raining. Wonder if these turkeys have the sense to stop looking up?

Carpe Phlogiston said...

AP Mongolia: Biden Cheneys Himself
Man, Biden really got some lift on that last arrow! It's going straight up... and now it's coming straight down. Is he gonna move or what??

GregMan said...

The crowd is amazed when Ronald Reagan comes down from heaven to endorse Gov. Christie.

GregMan said...

Here come the Germans to attack Pearl Harbor again!

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Jails are overcrowded, so you'll like this alternative... we're using a Haitian illegal for demo purposes, but it works just as well if you tie a drug dealer's foot to the helium balloon. Just send 'em up whenever the winds are heading out to sea.
What if the wind changes direction?
You ever go skeet shooting?

Rodney Dill said...

"It says, Surrender Dorothy"

Dactyl said...

That cloud looks like a bunny, and that one looks like a Predator drone, and that one looks like a nice Philly cheesesteak. Say, you guys hungry? *Snort* look who I'm talking to, of course you are.

Rodney Dill said...

"Look, Halley's Comet"

Anonymous said...

"Look! Its a Unicorn with flames coming out of its ass and loosing altitude! Is that a little black kid riding it? Nah, just Obama..."

-Oiao

WV = arans; what the dumb Progressive Leftists think anyone right of Hitler are called.

prince of leaves said...

"So you see, Governor, with the new Phalanx batteries we've installed on the suspension towers, those Occupy Wall Street monors won't dare try to 'take' the George Washington Bridge."

Anonymous said...

"Da plane! Da plane"!

Vinneh

prince of leaves said...

"The top-secret ultrasound imagers we used are showing us that Hoffa is in the concrete of the upper deck, at the base of that light tower right there..."

sifty said...

If you look really carefully you can see the top of Obama's deficit.

sifty said...

I swear to God I thought turkeys could fly.

essays said...

This is really interesting thing good post. Thanks you for your work!)

blue said...

Look! Up in the sky!
It's a bird...
It's a plane....
No - it's a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.......

jimmy said...

"Hey, is that Rick Perry standing on the railing?" ---Governor Christie's endorsement of Mitt Romney was seen by some as the final straw.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

@jimmy - I hear Perry put the gloves on and came out swinging at last evening's episode of Liar's Poker. Unfortunately for his supporters, he was swing dancing and wore full length opera gloves.

Rodney Dill said...

"Man, Obama sure got high marks."
"Maybe next time he'll clear the wall."
"RELOAD THE CATAPULT."

JohnS1959 said...

"Look there guys, if you stare into the sun and squint, you can see the last glimmer of hope for the economy as it dies of neglect", said Steve.

JohnS1959 said...

"Hey you there", shouted the Major, "No man riding!"

Jack Reacher said...

"And here comes the air-drop of thousands of term papers."