Al
1. M'Chel demonstrates the proper technique for "organically fertilizing" the garden.
2. "Like the kicks, little cracker girl? They cost more than your daddy will see in a month of paychecks. Face!"
3. "Oh, look, Mrs Obama, here's those french fries you planted last spring. I told you they wouldn't sprout but did you listen? No-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o?"
4. "Look, Mrs. Obama, just because you'd rather be on vacation in Aspen or the Spanish Riviera is no excuse to poop on my head."
5. "So, anyway, Mrs. Obama, my dad is a top bundler and he wants a half-billion dollar 'loan' --- wink-wink --- for his 'Solar Energy Company' --- do you think we can do business?"
Threadwinner: prince of leaves
"Just a little further back, a little further..." Betsy urged, watching M'Chel's feet inch ever closer to the hidden punji trap.
Best of Passionate Conservative
M'chel demonstrates how big her balls really are.
Best of GregMan
"This is some really good ganja. I'll just hide it in my butt so's we can get it past security."
Best of Capt. Queeg
"Damn Target-brand butt closures!"
Best of jj
With mating season fast approaching, M'chelle leaves her scent.
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
I'm discreetly fanning the zone cause that durn recurring yeast problem is flaring up. Don't say anything or I'll whack you with my eatin shovel.
Best of JohnS1959
Little Sally: "No ma'am, that is not a weed. That was our last dill plant. Now we will have nothing to flavor our gruel!"
Best of Vinneh
"I'll help you sweetheart. Let me first shake this dingleberry loose."
Best of Dactyl
With a triumphant shout the First Lady ripped the entire pine tree out of the earth, revealing the small child hiding behind it and winning the annual White House game of hide-and-seek.
26 comments:
Well, Betsy, to be honest, like a lot of older women, it used to look just like this before I those weekly Brazilian waxes. At least I don't have feathers!
Peacock imitation?.... Yer doing it wrong!!!!
"Wait a minute, don't you buy this shit at Target?"
cool photot) very funny)
M'chel demonstrates how big her balls really are.
We are fast approaching our fund raising deadline. If you can donate just $5 today you will be entered into a contest to win dinner with the President. Second prize is an opportunity to pick vegetables out of the royal garden and you could pick enough peas, carrots, and potatoes to feed your whole family for an entire week.
FAN DANZ; UR DUIN IT RONG
Yes, that IS a hand, and unless you want to be the next one planted, you'll forget you saw it. Do I make myself clear?
"...and we plant carrots, zuchinis and egg plants for when your daddy is traveling..."
Some people can pull a rabbit out of a hat. M'Chel can pull a tree branch out of her butt.
"This is some really good ganja. I'll just hide it in my butt so's we can get it past security."
How 70's?
"Damn Target-brand butt closures!"
Damn Michelle, if your ass hasn't thrown the whole page into shadow.
With mating season fast approaching, M'chelle leaves her scent.
I see the carrot TOPS, but where are the... oh my.
I've seen this sort of thing before. Once, I gave a squirrel some sunflower seeds, and he had like, 20 of them stuffed in his cheeks.
I'm discreetly fanning the zone cause that durn recurring yeast problem is flaring up. Don't say anything or I'll whack you with my eatin shovel.
-OR-
Dammm, eese are nassy tassing cawwots!
Not carrots, ma'am, you just ate maggot-infested fennel roots we tossed on the compost pile. I think your tongue's beginning to swell up.
Why is the Smith's garden so lush and untouched by vermin? They've got the best scarecrow on the block.
"Just a little further back, a little further..." Betsy urged, watching M'Chel's feet inch ever closer to the hidden punji trap.
Little Sally: "No ma'am, that is not a weed. That was our last dill plant. Now we will have nothing to flavor our gruel!"
First Lady: "Well eat artichokes then, they are wonderful with truffle butter..."
So, do the kids that M'Chel forces to work in her garden count as "jobs created or saved"?
"I'll help you sweetheart. Let me first shake this dingleberry loose."
Vinneh
Rather than a lengthy diatribe, M'chelle chose a visual aid to explain why it's important to eat a bushel of roughage per day to keep healthy.
With a triumphant shout the First Lady ripped the entire pine tree out of the earth, revealing the small child hiding behind it and winning the annual White House game of hide-and-seek.
She could use a Brazilian wax job.
..............arf
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