Monday, October 24, 2011

Cain and Disabled


1. "Dammit, lady... I was not on Deep Space Nine, and I don't know who the f-ck 'Odo' is. Who the hell put my book signing at a Star Trek convention?"

2."Sure, I'll write 9-9-9 om your tits."

3. "Sure, Mrs. Clinton. I'll fetch you some coffee right away."

4. "My next impression... Bob Dole!"

5. "Naw, don't worry ma'am. I'm not actually going to whip anything out. It's just a caption."

Best of Vinneh
"No, I don't do weather reports."

Best of metalgarth
"I'm glad you like rice, but my name's not Ben and I'm not your Uncle"

Best of Mr Hankey
Of course, you’ll have the good taste not to mention that I spoke to you...
Yes ma'am

Best of dadoctah
"Okay, so that's one large thin crust with mushrooms and anchovies, and a side order of cheesy breadsticks."

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Oh, yes ma'am, I've tons more weird ass ideas. I'm like Arthur Carlson of WKRP in Cincinnati, sitting in my office a'pondering and playing with rocketship pens... like this'n.

Best of Jack Reacher
"Ask me no crazy questions and I'll give you no wild-ass answers. Probably."

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

"No, I don't do weather reports."

Vinneh

metalgarth said...

"I'm glad you like rice, but my name's not Ben and I'm not your Uncle"

GregMan said...

"So this is where the white women at."

Dr. Doom said...

"No ma'am," replied Mr. Cain, "I like my white meat dry and I don't even have a teleprompter."

mpur said...

Yes, Ma'am, I do validate parking.

blue said...

yes Miss Daisy, I'll get the car right quick

Mr Hankey said...

Of course, you’ll have the good taste not to mention that I spoke to you...

Yes ma'am

Anonymous said...

"Let me show why I am the person this country needs right now. OK, write 999 on a piece of paper... now turn it upside down, like this. What have you got? That's right, six six six. In other words, you could call me the anti-antichrist. Exactly what this country needs right now to end the reign of Barack Obama."

Steve O said...

An unbiased representative from the huffingtonpost tries to convince Herman Cain that he should withdraw for the good of the party. The Republicans really need to nominate a "centrist" governor from a liberal Northeastern state. Not an idealogue, but a technocrat running on a competency platform.

You know, a Republican version of Michael Dukakis.

dadoctah said...

"Okay, so that's one large thin crust with mushrooms and anchovies, and a side order of cheesy breadsticks."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Oh, yes ma'am, I've tons more weird ass ideas. I'm like Arthur Carlson of WKRP in Cincinnati, sitting in my office a'pondering and playing with rocketship pens... like this'n.

-OR-

While intended as thought-provoking, Herman's campaign slogan - "Where to?" - had a different reaction when Miss Daisy walked up and introduced herself.

WordVerify: defib - Embedding investigative reporters behind every legislative and corporate closed door might've accomplished this without the need for WIKILeaks.

Jack Reacher said...

"Ask me no crazy questions and I'll give you no wild-ass answers. Probably."

Rodney Dill said...

"Sorry, I don't do Fat Albert."