Saturday, August 27, 2011

Your Law Enforcement Dollars at work

Sondra k



1. Police rapidly broke up the latest demonstration by "Muffintops not Bombs."

2. Simultaneous body cavity searches and breast exams; an example of the Obama Regime's "Compassionate Fascism Initiative."

3. LaKeisha didn't really enjoy being the "mean black cop" in the fantasies of middle-aged hippie lesbians... but in this economy, any job would do.

4. Surprisingly, the first white folks sent to the Re-Education Camps after Obama was re-elected were Sally Jessie Raphael and Julianne Moore.

5. "Nope, not real. Not spectacular."


Best of mega
Visiting blue states is getting a lot harder these days.

Best of Whacko
"If'n you gots any of them Gibson guitars stashed away, better tell us now or we gonna sweat it out of you down at the station house."

Best of Submariner
Not real; twenty five dollar silicone tax...

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Elsie, if you don't stop saying, "This glove's from the Playtex Lift & Separate collection" I swear I'm gonna zap you with my Taser.

Best of jj
Cop on radio, "Tell the White House I got the white wimmen".

23 comments:

mega said...

Obama's plan from the beginning had been, of course, to open up a new slave trade from America to Africa. At the entrance ramps to the pens of Dakar, new arrivals were searched thoroughly before walking to the auction block.

mega said...

Visiting blue states is getting a lot harder these days.

mega said...

Sally wished she hadn't made that comment about she and her friends having "taxable assets on them".

Whacko said...

"If'n you gots any of them Gibson guitars stashed away, better tell us now or we gonna sweat it out of you down at the station house."

Chronos the Wonder Pig said...

cop: "damn, why aren't these Thursday Babes?'

Double the U said...

Hold on, hold on, I know I have something for that on my belt somewhere.

Jack Reacher said...

At the Enumclaw Old Navy, you need to do more than show your receipt at the door.

Jack Reacher said...

Workers at the Moon Pie factory are searched after each shift, to ensure nothing is lost to pilferage. Betty and Eileen, however, have obviously found another way to smuggle out the goodies.

Submariner said...

Contributions made to the RNC from within the Beltway were dealt with swiftly and predictably by the Administration...

Submariner said...

Not real; twenty five dollar silicone tax...

Submariner said...

We gots our hands on that Carmen San Diego person and her "boyfriend" Chief. You want us to bring her in?

Dr. Doom said...

"Chief, I need backup out here", radioed TSA Officer Latisha, "We have a 414 out here... yes sir that's right... silicone smugglers, over."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

TSA's Grope & Feel exam uses life-like test dummies to identify overly aggressive trainees... so they can immediately be put to work.

WordVerify: rogine - FDA says this Chinese knockoff does regrow hair, but only in unusual places like between your toes and on the roof of your mouth.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Elsie, if you don't stop saying, "This glove's from the Playtex Lift & Separate collection" I swear I'm gonna zap you with my Taser.

-OR-

Whitey, you looks jest like da cafeteria lady at Mubutu High! Why, you IS da cafeteria lady, da one who used to make me eat dem freaking peas. I hates peas. This just isn't gonna be cafeteria lady's lucky day. STRIP SEARCH!

Anonymous said...

Who does she think she is? A TSA agent?

jj said...

Cop on radio, "Tell the White House I got the white wimmen".

jj said...

Bill Clinton's private security force makes sure that visitors leaving his office have no unusual stains showing.

Rodney Dill said...

...am I gonna hafta separate you two?

Dactyl said...

Ever been to a Turkish holding cell?

Submariner said...

Boob...
Boob...
Bomb!

Anonymous said...

Woman on right thinking: "Hey, that woman's prison thing might not be soooooo bad....?"

Oiao

Kaptain Krude said...

Why do I suddenly hear Barry White singing?

Merovign said...

Why does she have one black arm and one white one? I've heard of trucker's arm, but that's ridiculous.