Monday, August 22, 2011

Hey, Guess Who Just Saw His Approval Numbers

Jack Creature


1. I have got to remember not to sit in an armored SUV after M'Chel makes a run to the border.

2.John Boehner really needs to lay off the tanning.

3. It's getting harder and harder for Obama to read the Teleprompter and dodge spitwads at the same time.

4."The price of arugula is even more horrible than I imagined."

5. "I personally destroyed America? Then. this is the happiest day of my life!"

Best of jj
Damn, m'chelle wants sex again!?!?

Best of Dr. Doom
"Really guys, this is too much, I didn’t even know there was a Nobel prize for vacationing", sighed the President tearfully, "What's that? Oh, Guinness Worldbook Prize... that makes a lot more sense."

Best of Submariner
Uh, memories;
misty, um, water-colored memories...

Best of Submariner
Send in the clowns.
There ought to be clowns.
Don't bother - I'm here...

Best of dadoctah
"It's not coming off! I'm wiping and wiping and it's *NOT COMING OFF*!!!"

Best of mega
Pack of cards, $3.00. Holding up the Queen of Diamonds at an Obama campaign event: priceless.

Best of Rodney Dill
The Ennui of ultimate power is exhausting... time for another vacation.

Best of Vinneh
"Here's some scary shit. I just took a piss and Chris Matthews was in the urinal next to me."

Best of GregMan
"*Sob* My approval numbers are falling so fast it's going to cause an earthquake."
What, too soon?

Best of Spineless Vertebra
Sir, I know you haven't made V the K's best of list in two weeks, but I'm sure it's nothing personal.

Best of Steve O
Awwww. Did someone just lose their job to an ATM machine?

Best of Cricket
Under this is the real Harrison J. Bounel."

32 comments:

jj said...

Damn, m'chelle wants sex again!?!?

jj said...

Glad my middle name is Hussein, not Moammar...

Dr. Doom said...

"Really guys, this is too much, I didn’t even know there was a Nobel prize for vacationing", sighed the President tearfully, "What's that? Oh, Guinness Worldbook Prize... that makes a lot more sense."

Anonymous said...

"President for Life???? No guys, really, that's too much...."

blue said...

"A little Jussipussi always make me cry!"

Submariner said...

Uh, memories;
misty, um, water-colored memories...

Submariner said...

Send in the clowns.
There ought to be clowns.
Don't bother - I'm here...

dadoctah said...

"It's not coming off! I'm wiping and wiping and it's *NOT COMING OFF*!!!"

ATDHE

dub said...

Why do Barry's eyes water after having sex? Mace.

Kaptain Krude said...

"If you, um, can't stand the, um, heat, um, some folks say to, um, to - uh, to get out of the, um, kitchen."

Kaptain Krude said...

"That damnable, um, TelePrompTer! How dare it, um, how dare it, um, how dare it go down, um, just when I, um, needed it most?"

mega said...

Pack of cards, $3.00. Holding up the Queen of Diamonds at an Obama campaign event: priceless.

Rodney Dill said...

Man this bloviating is hard work.

Rodney Dill said...

The Ennui of ultimate power is exhausting... time for another vacation.

Submariner said...

For a minute there, I thought this was a pic of OJ when his verdict came through...

Submariner said...

Barry is informed Malia just got arrested at Old Navy while shopping with Dawn.

Submariner said...

I'm sorry, Mr. Soros. But it just gets me right here when you speak of the elimination of Amerikkka...

Submariner said...

I'm sorry, Mr. Soros; I'm taking down the economy as fast as I can. But I PROMISE I'll try harder in September!

Submariner said...

ORA:

The new phone bill arrives and BO finds out Beijing in not a local call from DC...

Submariner said...

It ain't twoo. It ain't twoo...

Submariner said...

5 seconds after the Pres walked in on the Secretary of State taking a wizz in the White House water closet...

Anonymous said...

"Here's some scary shit. I just took a piss and Chris Matthews was in the urinal next to me."

Vinneh

Rodney Dill said...

"Thank God, she stopped talking and put on her iPod headphones."

GregMan said...

"*Sob* My approval numbers are falling so fast it's going to cause an earthquake."

What, too soon?

Spineless Vertebra said...

Sir, I know you haven't made V the K's best of list in two weeks, but I'm sure it's nothing personal.

Steve O said...

Awwww. Did someone just lose their job to an ATM machine?

Kaptain Krude said...

"Whew, all of this finger-pointing at George W. Bush sure is exhausting!"

Kaptain Krude said...

"Have I heard of Ron Paul? For a second there, I thought you said the country had gone for a recall!"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Well, there was this earthquake, but I didn't know it because Michelle was yakking on the red phone. I figured real Americans had finally had enough and were overthrowing me... so I wet my pants and broke out into a sweat. I'm okay now.

-OR-

For cryin' out loud, Biden, put that down! It's not REALLY a FOOTBALL!!

JohnS1959 said...

POTUS: "Whew that was a close one, what did it measure Bob?"

National Science Advisor: "Oh that wasn't an earthquake Mr. President, apparently the founding fathers are all spinning in their graves in unison"...

Jack Reacher said...

Proof that when you scratch a liberal, you find a Marxist underneath.

Cricket said...

Under this is the real Harrison J. Bounel.