Wednesday, August 17, 2011
The Giant Black Weiner Mobile
1. "Where the frak are we? Biden, gimme that map!"
2. "The wheels on the bus go 'round and... um... round... all... dammit, how does it go? Get me my damn Teleprompter."
3. ORA: As Malachi's shouts of "Outlander! Outlander! We have your woman!" faded in his ears, Obama could only smile.
4. "Somebody made the mistake of asking that Dawn woman to sit in the back and... well... it's just a godawful mess back there."
5. "If we spend less than $50,000,000 an hour, this bus will explode."
Best of Dr. Doom
The Obama Misery Tour bus stops in Iowa so the President can fertilize a wheat field with his campaign rhetoric.
Best of sonicfrog
ORA: “There is a world, just beyond now, where reality runs a razor thin seam between fact and possibility; where the laws of the present collide with the crimes of tomorrow. Patrolling these vast outlands is a new breed of lawman, guarding the fringes of society’s frontiers, they are known simply as ‘Highwaymen’... and this is their story...”
Best of Jack Reacher
You call it corn, we call it downgrade.
Best of sonicfrog
David Attenborough: "... And, like a lion in the Sarengeti, we see - how stealthfully - this magnificent creature of the wild - stalks it's Conservative prey..."
Best of jimmy
Bogged down? No problem. We can count on government to come pull us out.
Best of metalgarth
Black helicopters are so 1990s and have too big of a 'carbon footprint'
Best of GregMan
Andrew Sullivan sighed and said, "It's big, and black, and long, and hard! It even has Obama in it! Home run!"
Best of jj
This one'll never bottom out like the limo in London. M'chelle's on the other bus.
Best of Submariner
...and then the President was wished behind the wheat...
Best of Uchuck the Tuchuck
Why am I hearing "The Ride of the Valkyries" being played on six kazoos and a juice harp?
Best of Dactyl
It's engine humming quietly, it's magnificent grill and foretires eagerly awaiting prey to be thrown under them, the great Barakosaurus Federalus will crouch patiently in the underbrush for days on end, if necessary. Waiting for a herd of unwitting taxpayers, perhaps; or a lone former ally that's grown weak and outlived it's usefulness to the Hope Collective...
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Can it do wheelies?? Perhaps if Michelle moved to the back of the bus. Ooops, sorry sir, poor choice of words.
Best of Rodney Dill
Cue the theme from "Jaws"