Al
1. And last years winner of the "Brownest Man in Washington" contest passes the baton to this year's winner.
2. "Sorry, Cantor, I don't touch Jews."
3. Obama never could figure out how Boehner could stick his arm in his back and make his hand come out through Cantor's chest.
4. "Good Lord, Cantor, your hands are enormous! Mrs. Cantor must be a very happy woman."
5. "We'll start dinner as soon as M'Chel gets here with the eatin' shovels."
Best of Dr. Doom
President Obama: "Call my bluff Boehner!"
Mr. Cantor: "Mr. President, Mr. Putin is on line three. He wants to talk about arms reductions"
Best of mpur
JB thought bubble: "Gah! Just touching him makes my laxative kick in!"
Best of Vinneh
Boehner: "We're repealing your tanning bed tax. It's killing me."
Best of jj
Cantor, "I shook Weiner's hand last month and I still can't get this stuff off".
Best of Double the U
Good, so it is agreed, we will fake argue for two weeks, and then screw over the citizens again by enacting terrible laws and restrictions on everything.
Best of mega
The SEIU control units hovering over Obama's head were more obvious in some photographs than others.
Best of mega
"Notice, Bill, that when he shakes Boehner's hand, his cheek muscle contracts slightly, and what that says is that he knows he's a fraudulent douche bag."
Best of USMC2841
"AP Newswire- Negotiations broke down again when it was revealed that Boehner had used a buzzer ring on the President..."
Best of Submariner
Repeat after me: "With this debt, I thee wed..."
Best of metalgarth
"we're exchanging long protein strands"
24 comments:
President Obama: "Call my bluff Boehner!"
Mr. Cantor: "Mr. President, Mr. Putin is on line three. He wants to talk about arms reductions"
B0: Look, we're in serious trouble. I sold my soul to get into the White House and refi'd it to continue Bush's banker/fatcat bailout.
JB Well, we congressmen are carrying triple mortgages on our souls just to hold our seats.
EC How the hell do we make a new pact with the devil if we got no more souls for him??
BO Give him the Supreme Court?
JB Deal!
-OR-
Then we're agreed,
Should we set a time limit?
Okay, one week from today we deal once around to me.
ORA M*A*S*H (the poker game)
JB thought bubble: "Gah! Just touching him makes my laxative kick in!"
Boehner: "We're repealing your tanning bed tax. It's killing me."
Vinneh
Actors congratulate each other after a performance.
"So we're agreed; tax hikes are cuts, spending hikes are cuts, and the old 'kick the can down the road' metaphor never gets old."
WV: wingiest. Should be an H in there.
Cantor, "I shook Weiner's hand last month and I still can't get this stuff off".
Good, so it is agreed, we will fake argue for two weeks, and then screw over the citizens again by enacting terrible laws and restrictions on everything.
Cantor; "I used 'stick-um' once and it wasn't as tenacious as Boehner's Tan-in-a-Can..."
Boehner finds out where he'll be when his colonic will kick in.
v word - wedin - nah, thinks it's more of a feudin...
Boehenr finds out BHO beat him out for the Jolson part due to his significantly better application of black face.
ATDHE - A
Boehner is informed the spoiled rich NFLPA was able to reach agreement before Congress.
A thought strikes the Speaker:
PROgress = getting something done.
CONgress = ?!?!?
"Buy 1 suit, get 2 for free!" The Jos A Bank commercials began to have a certain familiar vibe.
The SEIU control units hovering over Obama's head were more obvious in some photographs than others.
"And with this handshake, it's agreed that you neo-Nazis will get more tax breaks for hedge fund corporate jets, in return for not starving as many old sick people to death."
"Notice, Bill, that when he shakes Boehner's hand, his cheek muscle contracts slightly, and what that says is that he knows he's a fraudulent douche bag."
"Wow, white peoples' hands are a lot less clammy than Rev. Wright told me they'd be."
"You see with my hand behind his back the fool has no idea if I've crossed my fingers or not. And that's the way it's done."
"AP Newswire- Negotiations broke down again when it was revealed that Boehner had used a buzzer ring on the President..."
"Well fellas, lets hit the clock and grab a beer", chorlted the President, "Nothing works up a thirst like screwing up the country eh John?"
Repeat after me:
"With this debt, I thee wed..."
"we're exchanging long protein strands"
Boehner "I'm Verklempt."
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