Monday, July 25, 2011

Why Bill Cheats



1. Somewhere in Arkansas, there's an ugly tree with a pile of branches at the bottom.

2. "Sorry about the hair, I accidentally hit the overcharge button again."

3. Hillary greets her usual welcoming committee of villagers with torches and pitchforks.

4. Rush Limbaugh's quotation about feminism proven once again.

5. So, that's why they call it a Moo-moo. 

Best of Vinneh
And that's why it's called The Dress Barn.

Best of Rodney Dill
"Guess I picked the wrong week to give up amphetamines."

Best of GregMan
And then Dub's head... oh, hell, and then everyone's head exploded.

Best of divine miss m
Bubbie??!

Best of sonicfrog
Separated at birth... And office!!!! Hillary and President Allyson Taylor!!!!

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Hilary breathlessly exclaims, "I feel so much better since my lobotomy. No worries, no sleepless nights, no carrying grudges against rotten cheating adulterous a-hole husbands who can't keep it in their... BSOD rebooting"

Threadwinner: Jack Reacher
Rep. Weiner, your aversion therapist is here.

Best of Whacko
Hey Hill, M'Chel called and wants her drapes back.

Best of Submariner
Who dropped the house on my sister? I wan't to THANK him/her for clearing up that whole probate thing...

Best of Submariner
ORA - Thawt bubble; "I deserve good things. I am entitled to my share of happiness. I refuse to beat myself up. I am an attractive person. I am fun to be with."

Best of mega
Chelsea wondered sometimes how it is that she ever came to exist.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Some women walk into their closet and carefully select and coordinate an outfit. Others just dive in, wallow around and hope static cling has fashion sense. It.does.not.

35 comments:

Rodney Dill said...

Looks like Hillary finally discovered ICHC,

Rodney Dill said...

Last known photo's of 27 year old Amy Winehouse.

Anonymous said...

I hope that's a tattoo and not her dress.

Vinneh

Anonymous said...

And that's why it's called The Dress Barn.

Vinneh

Rodney Dill said...

"I'm from the government and I'm here to help."

Rodney Dill said...

"Guess I picked the wrong week to give up amphetamines."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Typically phony State Dept. grin means the 3-martini & uppers breakfast kicked in. The belly hints at a 3-martini lunch, a 3-martini afternoon pick-me-up and a 3-martini dinner topped off with a classic 3-martini nightcap.

-OR-

Now who would she remind you of if she wore a bikini and purple netting?

-OR-

Must have gotten that from Michelle's favorite vacation tapestry store.

metalgarth said...

Meh. I prefer the original Ronald McDonald much better.

GregMan said...

And then Dub's head... oh, hell, and then everyone's head exploded.

GregMan said...

Photographic proof that Great Lord Cthulhu has risen at last!

blue said...

Hillary keeps reminding us why we should have elected her president.

Censors Hip said...

The truth comes out, M'Chel inherited her eating shovels from Hillary!

divine miss m said...

Bubbie??!

Dr. Doom said...

Dateline Washington DC:

Ms. Clinton beams as she leaves the meeting of her coven having just mastered the withering spell. Mr. Clinton was unavailable for comment (and plans to stay that way according to unnamed sources).

Dr. Doom said...

Dateline Isle of Lesbos:

The Secretary of State made a brief statement to reporters after negotiations to resolve the Greek debt crisis stalled again. She was quoted as saying Minister Leslie and I almost got there this time. We will try again and again and again if necessary unitl we achieve the goal...

sonicfrog said...

Separated at birth... And office!!!! Hillary and President Allyson Taylor!!!!

mpur said...

Michelle called and asked, "What? No boob belt?"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Hilary breathlessly exclaims, "I feel so much better since my lobotomy. No worries, no sleepless nights, no carrying grudges against rotten cheating adulterous a-hole husbands who can't keep it in their... BSOD rebooting"

Jack Reacher said...

Rep. Weiner, your aversion therapist is here.

Whacko said...

Hey Hill, M'Chel called and wants her drapes back.

blue said...

Knowing that she will be forced to resign when Palin beats Obama in next year's election, Hillary auditions for the new Simpsons character - Mrs. Crusty the Clown.


WV: coonbra - there is a joke here soemwhere

champaignken said...

Richard Simmons has really let himself go.

Submariner said...

Who dropped the house on my sister? I wan't to THANK him/her for clearing up that whole probate thing...

Submariner said...

And YOU my college pictures made me look BAD?!?

Submariner said...

ORA

Thawt bubble; "I deserve good things. I am entitled to my share of happiness. I refuse to beat myself up. I am an attractive person. I am fun to be with."

Submariner said...

We certainly don't have to worry about Vince Foster ever being exhumed now, do we; hmmmmmm? Anyone know how to get lye out of a caftan?

Submariner said...

Thawt bubble; "Who'da thunk Merkle wore a merkin?"

mega said...

"I'm here to get in on either the Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, Israel, Russia, Euro crisis, Greece, or China trade talks. Anyone know where the meetings are?"

mega said...

Chelsea wondered sometimes how it is that she ever came to exist.

mega said...

The pearls lend a certain sense of subdued dignity.

Double the U said...

♬ ♪ Mighty mighty, just lettin' it all hang out
The lady's stacked and that's a fact,
ain't holding nothing back.
It's a sick!----blouse!
♫ ♩

Chronos the Wonder Pig said...

Hillary 2012!!

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

Sec of State Clinton arrives at the H.R. Puffinstuff Anniversary Gala in style.

Steve O said...

Make fun all you want. Women's dress codes are COMPLICATED.

Apparently.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Some women walk into their closet and carefully select and coordinate an outfit. Others just dive in, wallow around and hope static cling has fashion sense. It.does.not.