Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Meanwhile, Back at the Walmur

Schneider


Best of GregMan
And then Dub's head exploded.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
David Attenborough whispers: We've come upon a stark reminder of fishing trawler collateral damage... an unidentifiable bloated carcass entangled in a discarded drift net. Folks, this brings tears to my eyes.

Best of mpur
I didn't know they used nets to catch whales.

Best of Dr. Doom
Senator Jackson-Lee goes (excuse the expression) undercover to prove that Wal-Mart is raaacist...

Best of Censors Hip
Under Obama's redistribution of wealth plan, customers must take the next hooker in line.....

Best of Double the U
John Water's remake of "The Color Purple"

Best of satted
Thank goodness we used 400lb testline...

Best of Rodney Dill
That's no moon....

Best of Submariner
Let's see... I need Danish, Coffe Cakes, Cheesecake, Haagen Daz, Butter, Cream Cheese, Block Cheese, Whipped Cream, and Coffee. Black coffee - no Coffee Mate or Splenda for you this time, Marla, you're serious about counting your calories this time.

Best of Vinneh
Clean up on aisle 4.

28 comments:

GregMan said...

And then Dub's head exploded.

GregMan said...

"Oh good, it's diet Coke."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

David Attenborough whispers: We've come upon a stark reminder of fishing trawler collateral damage... an unidentifiable bloated carcass entangled in a discarded drift net. Folks, this brings tears to my eyes.

-OR-

Later, back at the double-wide, Earlene would complain to her half-drunk husband about a fat cashier who wore an ill-fitting t-shirt in a hideous shade of green.

-OR-

That used to be a tightweave cableknit sweater before Bertha started putting on the pounds.

mpur said...

I didn't know they used nets to catch whales.

Dr. Doom said...

Senator Jackson-Lee goes (excuse the expression) undercover to prove that Wal-Mart is raaacist...

mpur said...

"Senator Jackson-Lee..."

Yes, and this sexy little number is what got her promoted from Representative Jackson-Lee.

Censors Hip said...

Under Obama's redistribution of wealth plan, customers must take the next hooker in line.....

Double the U said...

John Water's remake of "The Color Purple"

satted said...

The one that got away... a wee bit to big for the net.

satted said...

Thank goodness we used 400lb testline...

satted said...

And so what!... I only voted for Obama 6 times.

Submariner said...

Shopping in the "Baby Daddy" section...

Submariner said...

Something tells me she knits with parachute cord instead of yarn.

Submariner said...

Pardon me miss; the Lions could really use an offensive tackle that can line block. Are you interested?

Rodney Dill said...

That's no moon....

Submariner said...

Let's see...
I need Danish, Coffe Cakes, Cheesecake, Haagen Daz, Butter, Cream Cheese, Block Cheese, Whipped Cream, and Coffee. Black coffee - no Coffee Mate or Splenda for you this time, Marla, you're serious about counting your calories this time.

Submariner said...

Mom?

Submariner said...

She tells me that John Edwards was TOO good...



v word - gulble - I think she might have been.

jj said...

Do I want ribbed for my pleasure, or thin for him???

dadoctah said...

Jeez, the Justice League will let *anybody* join these days.

Anonymous said...

Clean up on aisle 4.

Vinneh

HLam said...

Although the body was created by St. Pauli Girl, that ain't no St. Pauli Girl body!

Dactyl said...

She can just use the Anthony Weiner excuse: hey, just giving the little fella some air!

[Am I the only one who assumed she was pregnant?]

Dr. Doom said...

Sorry everyone - didn't mean to give the squirrel a promotion...

Rodney Dill said...

Where's Stewie and the tuba?

Carpe Phlogiston said...

@Dactyl - Sometimes it's best not to assume... or even dare consider the possibility that they breed, or inbreed, or worse, might be paedogenic.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Guinness World Records - Filed under belly buttons: Elsie Gortmunder officially has the world's biggest "outie."

Matt the K said...

Grape Googly Moogly!!!