Wednesday, June 15, 2011

What's in the Bag, Billy Boy?



1. The Gruesome Specter of Death figured Bill was due for another coronary any time now.

2. Bill Clinton arrives at a Hollywood fundraiser with guest, Kim Cattrall.

3.Clinton and Richards emerge from Woody Harrelson's house having scored some "Primo Sh-t."

4. This is gonna be the lamest Thunderdome ever.

5. Bill Clinton would come to regret saying 'Beetlejuice' three times.


Threadwinner Double the U
Clinton and Obama walk out of the room after seeing Hillary naked.

Best of dadoctah
At the conclusion of an intervention from a bunch of *real* musicians, Bill carries away the remains of his saxophone.

Best of mpur
Richards had no clue who the guy was, but he made an excellent mule since the police never, ever seemed to mess with him.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
Obscure John Carpenter Alert:
Keith's special glasses permitted him to see what he suspected all along; the aliens were here, they were masking their presence with subliminal imaging, and Bill Clinton was a dickhead.

Best of Submariner
Bill and Hill leave the spa following her make-over...

Best of prince of leaves
So now Bill's boinking Cher?

Best of prince of leaves
Bill looks great, but Hillary really needs another lifeforce feeding.

Best of metalgarth
it's not what you think, we just got some take out from McPatterson's on the way home. Now where's my Possum McNuggets

Best of Jack Reacher
Mistaking Clinton's hand for a "Don't Walk" sign, Richards freezes in place.

Best of Adriane
Even More Obscure Boris Sagal Alert ...
Well, it's true Clinton didn't bear the sacred marks, but then Matthias was busted for using forbidden tools ... so the Secret Service v. zombie showdown kind of ended in a draw ...

Best of Vinneh
Who leaves a Tittie Bar with a doggie bag?

Bill Clinton.

Best of Spin
After the Weiner scandal Hilary decided to return Bill's penis.

35 comments:

Dr. Doom said...

Bill and Keith are leaving for the Halloween party. Bill is masquerading as a world leader and Keith as a life form.

Dr. Doom said...

"Hey", said Mr. Clinton as they leave with the bag of bud, "Lets tweet that Weiner guy and get him to tag along. Dude knows how to get the ladies"...

"Weiner", replied Keith Richards, "I'm hungry"...

jj said...

Bill and Keith leave Monica's house with a BJ to go...

WV: begra..Viagra for married men...

Mr. Hankey said...

Keith is unable to respond upon learning that Bill Clinton has been able to get some "Satisfaction" so easily.

Mr. Hankey said...

2020 - Bill and Hillary (post-op) have a night on the town.

Rodney Dill said...

Bozo and Harpo Marx

dadoctah said...

At the conclusion of an intervention from a bunch of *real* musicians, Bill carries away the remains of his saxophone.

Unscrupulous said...

With a gun to his back, Clinton calmly waves to the crowd of onlookers. He had no idea why Kieth Richards would want a bag of used cigars, he was just glad he saved them.

mpur said...

Richards had no clue who the guy was, but he made an excellent mule since the police never, ever seemed to mess with him.

Son Of The Godfather said...

"I'm going to visit Ms.Lewinsky. I think you can understand the need for the bag."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Obscure John Carpenter Alert:
Keith's special glasses permitted him to see what he suspected all along; the aliens were here, they were masking their presence with subliminal imaging, and Bill Clinton was a dickhead.

Son Of The Godfather said...

If they had a baby, it'd be a boner addicted to smack.

Son Of The Godfather said...

And first contact is blown over one man's failure to return a simple Vulcan greeting.

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Now if y'all will excuse me, per Hillary, I've got to bic-light this bag of sh!t on Anthony's doorstep."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Yes, even this ticket is more appealing to me than Obama in 2012. You could show me a picture of a pig and a raisin and I'd say the same thing. Oh wait...

Submariner said...

Bill and Hill leave the spa following her make-over...

Submariner said...

"Nothing to see here. These are not the men you are seeking..."

Bill took great delight that his ancient politician mind trick still worked on the msm.

Submariner said...

Bill always brought along a donor when he visited the Bordello of Blood.



v word - obledle - obledlie, life goes on; BRA! La-la how the life goes on.

Kaptain Krude said...

Twenty 10-year-olds, ten 20-year-olds, or these two.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

The valet pointed and said, "Yeah, Clinton and Penny Marshall walked off down that away arm in arm singing, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 Schlemiel! Schlimazel! Hasenpfeffer Incorporated!"

-OR-

Boxers or Briefs?
Billy and Al Capone's surviving 146-year old zoot suit designer just finished with a fitting.

prince of leaves said...

So now Bill's boinking Cher?

prince of leaves said...

Bill looks great, but Hillary really needs another lifeforce feeding.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Carpe Phlogiston said...
Boxers or Briefs?


Depends. ;)

blue said...

At least one of the Glitter twins aged gracefully....

Carpe Phlogiston said...

@SOTG - Rumor has it Billy tried wearing the Depends thong style at Martha's Vineyard so he'd look "cool" around young girls. That's where his laxatives kicked in. You might say the idea backfired.

metalgarth said...

it's not what you think, we just got some take out from McPatterson's on the way home. Now where's my Possum McNuggets

metalgarth said...

The bag? Keith and I were just out walking the dog. He left a pile of 'stimulus' on the neighbor's yard.

Jack Reacher said...

Mistaking Clinton's hand for a "Don't Walk" sign, Richards freezes in place.

Adriane said...

Even More Obscure Boris Sagal Alert ...
Well, it's true Clinton didn't bear the sacred marks, but then Matthias was busted for using forbidden tools ... so the Secret Service v. zombie showdown kind of ended in a draw ...

Anonymous said...

Who leaves a Tittie Bar with a doggie bag?

Bill Clinton.


Vinneh

Spin said...

After the Weiner scandal Hilary decided to return Bill's penis.

Her mayoral campaign ramps up


VW - nolingul

Kaptain Krude said...

Man, Steven Tyler looks... well, actually he looks pretty good for his age.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Hey Kobe, we're going out to score some chicks. Are you open?"


(Just a variation on a theme.)

Double the U said...

Clinton and Obama walk out of the room after seeing Hillary naked.

Rodney Dill said...

All Lewinski's are not equal.