Thursday, June 23, 2011
Sad Vader Is Sad
1. "Vacation on Kamino" they said. "What could go wrong?" They said.
2. "Let's see, two banthas, two nerfs, two womp rats ... oops, shouldn't have mixed the wampas with the tauntauns."
3. "Gee, I must be on The Rain Planet. Did it ever occur to Lucas that planets might have more than one topographical feature per?"
4. Darth Vader's rendition of "Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head," was deleted from the Star Wars Holiday Specialto give more time to the Itchy/Diahann Carroll inter-species syber pr0n sequence.
5. "Rain? On Tatooine? Is Al Gore in town or something?"
Best of Dr. Doom
"But we had a deal", cried Algore, "How can I sell climate change now"?
"I am altering the deal", replied Lord Vader ominously, "Pray I don't alter it any further"...
Best of Army of Dad
"I'm Meeeelting..."
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
DORF on FORCE
Best of Mr. Hankey
George Lucas jumps the shark again with Nickelodean's new series "Star Wars - The Junior High Years"
Best of prince of leaves
"Oh great," O'Neill observed with ironic enthusiasm, "Darth Vader's now a Goa'uld. Nice."
Best of prince of leaves
"Someone...left the Sith out...in the rain....."
Best of Submariner
Sometimes it even reigns on a Cheney family picnic...
Best of Son Of The Godfather
Thought bubble: "The sound of water droplets bouncing off my sinister mask combined with the artificial respirator that sustains me... Is this what Nancy Pelosi feels like in the shower?"
Best of Son Of The Godfather
The science is settled. Sith-made global warming is a fact.
Best of Rodney Dill
"Wapner in 10 minutes... definitely."
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27 comments:
"But we had a deal", cried Algore, "How can I sell climate change now"?
"I am altering the deal", replied Lord Vader ominously, "Pray I don't alter it any further"...
"Look at the guy with the striped umbrella. What a nerd."
"I'm Meeeelting..."
They got little baby legs
That stand so low
You got to pick em up
Just to say hello
Don't want no short people
`Round here
DORF on FORCE
-OR-
deep baritone THAWTBUBBLE
Whoa... déjà vu. I saw this on Twilight Zone only this isn't a remote farmhouse and instead of the witch from Bewitched there's a fat crossing guard glaring at me!
-OR-
Help meeeeee! HELP MEEEEEEEE!
ORA The Fly
Oooh Nooooo... Mr. Darth Bill!
Hi, little buddy. Here, let me swat that mosquito on your ear with my light saber. ZZzzzzzzzz!
OOOOOOOOOOOO!
-OR-
For my next number, I'm going to tap dance while eating a bucket of KFC just to watch Dawn's head explode.
George Lucas jumps the shark again with Nickelodean's new series "Star Wars - The Junior High Years"
"Your Army Corps levees are no match for the hydrologic Force."
"Oh great," O'Neill observed with ironic enthusiasm, "Darth Vader's now a Goa'uld. Nice."
"Someone...left the Sith out...in the rain....."
Y'hafta be a really sick intercourse to p!ss on a Star Wars Lego set.
F*#k you, Lucas; we've worked for Mel Brooks.
Sometimes it even reigns on a Cheney family picnic...
"Prepare for Ludicrous Rain..."
v word - tortuals - What Jar Jar Binks was to the saga...
"I'm singing in the rain,I'm singing in the rain,
What a glorious feeling, I'm happy again."
Looks like MGM musicals are back with a sci-fi twist.
Vinneh
"Aren't you a little short for a Sith Lord?"
Thought bubble: "The sound of water droplets bouncing off my sinister mask combined with the artificial respirator that sustains me... Is this what Nancy Pelosi feels like in the shower?"
V word "deryto"... the snack chip for spelling handicapped!
Darth Vader in his waders.
"Sure," thought Vader, "just leave a small access tunnel to the core of the Death Star open for no apparent reason... yeah, that's a great idea."
"So I am responsible for untold deaths on countless worlds, have spread evil and fear throughout the galaxy, and yet, am somehow absolved by the solitary act of ridding the Empire of its leader? Joe Biden to the red courtesy phone, please..."
The science is settled. Sith-made global warming is a fact.
Use the cape to keep warm, Annakin. No one wants to hear a phlegmed up James Earl Jones.
"*Sigh*. I'll bet Shatner never has to put up with this kind of crap."
"Wapner in 10 minutes... definitely."
I find your lack of sun disturbing.
Mrs. Vader read the P.I.'s report and wept: Darth had indeed fathered a Jawa halfbreed on his Seattle business trip.
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