Monday, June 20, 2011

Tony and Huma

Brender


1. Huma: "That dangling the car keys to distract me trick only works on the underage bimbos you've been sexting."

2. "Go! Go! Gadget Keys!"

3. Huma smiled secretly; the next time Tony started the Pathfinder, her friends from the Muslim Sisterhood would have a little surprise for him.

4. Weiner: "I guess I will take the job at CNN, but only if they call the show Weiner-Spitzer."

5. Little did Tony or Huma suspect a naked, spread-eagled Meghan McCain was waiting for her "favorite Democrat" on the other side of the door.

Best of jj
No, the baby should be named Oscar-Mayer ... Weiner.

Best of GregMan
"Anthony, you can talk about what those teenagers said about your manhood alll you want, but Hillary's is still bigger."

Best of GregMan
"Dammit, Anthony, why couldn't have you done something more respectable, like rape an immigrant hotel maid? Sexting is just so ... common!"

Best of Mr. Hankey
We had "Bennifer" and "Bradgelina" - welcome "Humanthony"

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Verizon's new "Can You Hear Me Now" goto guy.

Best of Unscrupulous
Yes honey, I'll be home by 6.
Yes dear, I'll bring home milk.
No love, I have not jerked off and sent pictures to any porn sluts today.
I love you too.

Best of prince of leaves
On this week's episode of "Who's Really the Beard?"...

Best of blue
"So honey how was your trip? Did you catch any news shows while you were in the Middle East?'

Best of Submariner
Tony provides a size comparison using his house key...

23 comments:

blue said...

Huma: "I sure hope Hillary is staying over tonight!"

Chronos the Wonder Pig said...

Huma:"No question about it,if it's a boy we will name him Mohammed."

Anonymous said...

Oh, I get it - Mohammed Weiner - Mo Weiner for short

jj said...

No, the baby should be names Oscar-Mayer Weiner....

jj said...

...and a complete coincidence, the Weiners arrive in Detroit:

http://www.mlive.com/entertainment/detroit/index.ssf/2011/06/slows_bbq_oscar_mayer_wienermo.html

GregMan said...

"Anthony, you can talk about what those teenagers said about your manhood alll you want, but Hillary's is still bigger."

GregMan said...

"Dammit, Anthony, why couldn't have you done something more respectable, like rape an immigrant hotel maid? Sexting is just so common!"

HLam said...

"No, really. I thought I was texting you and typed 'Huma', but it was auto-corrected to 'hummer', and it just took off from there. I swear"

mpur said...

"Let me get the door for you, dear."

Anthony begins his life of servitude.

Mr. Hankey said...

We had "Bennifer" and "Bradgelina" - welcome "Humanthony"

dadoctah said...

If anything good's to come from this, at least stop calling our car the Weinermobile.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

How to Make Millions in Politics for DUMMIES
1. Get a job as a congressman/professional liar.
2. Sell out your country by selling votes.
3. Plan early retirement by creating a scandal.
4. If you're not a lawyer by vocation, become an overpaid talking head or lobbyist.
5. Write a tell all book for royalites
6. Invest that fat taxpayer-funded retirement package wisely.
Hon, I think our plan is on schedule.

-OR-

Mr. Weiner, oh Mr. Weiner, why are you entering sex rehab?
Because Huma said if they couldn't fix me, she'd have me fixed!"

-OR-

Verizon's new "Can You Hear Me Now" goto guy.

Unscrupulous said...

Yes honey, I'll be home by 6.

Yes dear, bring home milk.

No love, I have not jerked off and sent pictures to any porn sluts today.

I love you too.

prince of leaves said...

On this week's episode of "Who's Really the Beard?"...

blue said...

"So honey how was your trip? Did you catch any news shows while you were in the Middle East?'

Dr. Doom said...

"Really dude", said Huma, "It isn't at all impressive - why must you show it to everyone?"

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

"Huma? Why has the key to my chastity belt been taken off my keyring?"

Submariner said...

Tony provides a size comparison using his house key...

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Submariner said...

Darn it, Huma, the phrase is "short arm inspection." Will you PLEASE quit refering to it as a "pinky looky-see" at my press conference grovelings?

Rodney Dill said...

Huma: "WOUS's, I don't beleef dey exist."

Anonymous said...

"Oh shit, I forgot to pick up condoms at CVS...Never mind."

Vinneh

Kaptain Krude said...

"This is all your fault, you know. If you had had a real name instead of a made-up one like Huma, I wouldn't have been messing around."