1. "Dead Goatfrakker says what?"
2. "Mazel Tov!"
3. "Say 'Allahu Akbar' again, I dare you, motherf--ker! I double-dare you! Say 'Allahu Akbar' one more time!"
4. "Look right here, and wait for the flash."
5. "You're going to want to put some ice on that."
6. "Kneel before Zod!"
Best of Kaptain Krude
"Excuse me while I whip this out!"
Best of Kaptain Krude
"I'm ordering a whiskey bin Laden. That's two shots and a splash of water."
Best of blue
"Here's Johnny!"
Best of Jack Reacher
"We start filming 'Weekend At Osama's' in ten minutes."
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Okay, we'll give you more of a chance than you gave the people in the Twin Towers.
How about a 10-second head start?
Ready? Set?
1...
bang bang
Best of mpur
That's right goatf***ker, you're being taken out by the weakest US President in 30 years.
Best of Oiao
"President Bush sends his regards!"
Best of dadoctah
"NOBODY puts Baby in a corner! Wait, what?"
Best of Rodney Dill
"Screw you. I work for Mel Brooks."
Best of Dr. Doom
"Hello Mr. bin Laden", said the SEAL, "We have a bet. I bet that I could sew your dead a$$ into a pig carcass and sink you in a cesspool. My buddy here bets you won't fit into a pig carcass. What do you bet"?
Best of Army of Dad
"And Shepherds we shall be
For thee, my Lord, for thee.
Power hath descended forth from Thy hand
Our feet may swiftly carry out Thy commands.
So we shall flow a river forth to Thee
And teeming with souls shall it ever be.
In Nomeni Patri Et Fili Spiritus Sancti."
Best of Army of Dad
And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know My name is the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon thee.
Best of Army of Dad
"Flawless Victory!"
Best of dub
This is gonna hurt worse than Dub's eyes on most Thursdays.
Best of Rodney Dill
If Rigor Mortis last for more than four hours please seek immediate medical attention.
67 comments:
"Excuse me while I whip this out!"
"I'm ordering a whiskey bin Laden. That's two shots and a splash of water."
"Here's Johnny!"
"Yippy-ki-yay, mother******!"
ORA: "1314 Racine; I had a friend who lived there."
"I know what you're thinking; did he fire 18 shots, or only 17..."
Knock. Knock. Who is it? UPS.
"You might want to call 911."
"This is gonna hurt me more than it does you." BANG. "Well, that wasn't so bad for me. How about you? Hello?"
"We start filming 'Weekend At Osama's' in ten minutes."
"Knock, knock..."
"Who's there?"
Laaaand shark."
f*ck you, asshole
Hear's your last meal, goat molester. A bacon sandwich and 2 hollow points to wash it down.
-OR-
Okay, we'll give you more of a chance than you gave the people in the Twin Towers.
How about a 10-second head start?
Ready? Set?
1...
bang bang
That's right goatf***ker, you're being taken out by the weakest US President in 30 years.
In Pakistan, SEALS club you!
Let's roll.
"Zed's dead, baby. Zed's dead."
"I get a year's worth of free beer for this one. And oh yeah, that RAMF Ensign is polishing my boots too!"
- Oiao
Or....
"What a good waste of ammo, I should have done this with a knife and bailing wire."
(and for all you former JSOC mates)...
"I was never here!"
Congrats to the "Meat Eaters!!!!"
Word Verify = woodi (what I got when I found out the news!) So appropriate.
Sleep tight as JSOC is out there!
Smile, mutherf'r, you're on Candid Camera.
-OR-
Go ahead, make my day.
WordVerify: dothen - My I pwease have a dothen donuts?
Why sure, Congwesman Fwank.
"I win the Cupie Doll!!!!"
-Oiao
Or,
"I guess you never grew up shooting rats at the dump!"
"President Bush sends his regards!"
- Oiao
"NOBODY puts Baby in a corner! Wait, what?"
"SERENITY NOW!"
"LEEEROY JENKINS"
"Metsuyan."
"OMGWTFBBQ"
"Oh, I'm sorry, did I break your concentration?"
"Today is the first day of the rest of your death."
"PWNED"
"Screw you. I work for Mel Brooks."
"Ut oh. I know what you're thinking. Did I fire 50 rounds or only 49? To tell you the truth I kinda lost track myself in all the confusion...."
Vinney
"Hello Mr. bin Laden", said the SEAL, "We have a bet. I bet that I could sew your dead a$$ into a pig carcass and sink you in a cesspool. My buddy here bets you won't fit into a pig carcass. What do you bet"?
"And Shepherds we shall be
For thee, my Lord, for thee.
Power hath descended forth from Thy hand
Our feet may swiftly carry out Thy commands.
So we shall flow a river forth to Thee
And teeming with souls shall it ever be.
In Nomeni Patri Et Fili Spiritus Sancti."
"Say what again mother fucker!"
And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know My name is the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon thee.
Hey Osama, you are now third eye blind.
"KAAAHN!!!"
"It's Bush's fault!"
"Boom! Headshot!"
"Flawless Victory!"
"Get off my lawn! Forever!!!"
"I see you bin Laden, can you see me?"
I'm here on behalf of 3,000 souls, it's time to die.
"This is the operator, if you have recieved this message you are already dead. Goodbye."
"Squeal like a pig boy!"
"I'm just Terry Jonesing for you."
Tackleberry's ultimate mission.
Vinney
"You're fired"!
Vinney
Nobody, but nobody, puts ketchup on a hot dog anymore!
"Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?"
"Looks like you're ready for your close-up."
"Say 'what you talkin about Willis' ONE more time!"
"Bullet in the brain pan, squish!"
I know what you're thinking. Did I fire five shots or six? Seeing that this is the Baconator 3000 the most powerful pork gun in the world...
"Tweet this, Kutcher!"
After the headshot:
"Toast-y!!!!"
My word: lithe What Osama does at the bottom of the Arabian Sea.
Kaptain Krude said...
"I'm ordering a whiskey bin Laden. That's two shots and a splash of water."
I am going to be chuckling about that one for days.
ORA: Ding dong, mother fucker, ding dong.
This is gonna hurt worse than Dub's eyes on most Thursdays.
Boom goes the dynamite
Democracy! Whiskey! Sexy!
"It was a gun in my pocket, but I am happy to see you."
I have a really bad headache
If Rigor Mortis last for more than four hours please seek immediate medical attention.
That's some bad hat, Harry.
"Lighten up Francis."
"Say hello to my little friend!"
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