Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Oh, Let's Pile On, Shall We



1. "Remember when I said I'd use a condom... I lied!"

2. "Nah, my wife won't care... she is a Kennedy, after all."

3. ORA: "As my friends Hans and Franz would say, I am going to knock you up!"

4. "Pssst, the number for Planned Parenthood is 1-888-BABYVAC Just sayin'."

5. "Don't worry about it, it's not like you're Bristol Palin. Thank Gaia society doesn't hold old politicians to the same standards as young teenagers."

Best of dub
Get to da choppah!!

Best of USMC2841
The Sperminator.

Best of metalgarth
Schwartzenegg'er? I hardly know 'er

Best of Vinneh
"You know 'Love Child'. It's PC for bastard."

Best of jimmy
Arnie forgot the eleventh commandment: "Thou shalt not comfort thy rod with thy staff."

Best of Jack Reacher
"My wife doesn't understand me, which is a good thing, under the circumstances."

Best of mpur
Come with me if you want to f**k.

Best of prince of leaves
"Hasta el juego de paternidad, baby!"

Best of Kaptain Krude
"Your clothes... gib dem to me!"

Best of jj
Its OK. I'll call obama. He knows how to speak Austrian.

Best of Spineless Vertebra
"Well I can assure you that's not a cell phone in my pocket."

24 comments:

dub said...

Get to da choppah!!

USMC2841 said...

The Sperminator.

metalgarth said...

Schwartzenegg'er? I hardly know 'er

metalgarth said...

He must have 'used the schwartz' on her

Submariner said...

I vas de Governator uf Kali-for-ni-kashun!

Anonymous said...

"You know 'Love Child'. It's PC for bastard."

Vinney

Anonymous said...

"Shit, vere's Uncle Teddy vhen I need him"?

Vinney

jimmy said...

Arnie forgot the eleventh commandment: "Thou shalt not comfort thy road with thy staff."

jimmy said...

...er, rod

Jack Reacher said...

"Do you have any Austrian in you?
Would you like some?"

Jack Reacher said...

"My wife doesn't understand me, which is a good thing, under the circumstances."

Jack Reacher said...

"I'm tired of pretending to be a conservative. Let's try something new; let's pretend we're single."

mpur said...

Come with me if you want to f**k.

prince of leaves said...

"Hasta el juego de paternidad, baby!"

Kaptain Krude said...

"Your clothes... gib dem to me!"

WV: maxica - The youngest daughter of Mad Max, born in Mexico.

dadoctah said...

"Vait! Dat's how you make der babies?"

dadoctah said...

"I got news for you. DNA testing won't be able to prove conclusively that it's not Danny DeVito's. We're identical."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Possible bumper stickers for Ahnold's forehead:
a) You're surprised? Government hypocrites are a dime a dozen.
b) See, told you I am not Ghey!
c) Just call me Arnie Appleseed
d) I thought Maria'd be used to infidelity... it runs rampant in her family
e) I'll be back... erm, maybe not.
f) The child support check is in the mail
g) Wow, do I have a great idea for a sitcom
h) Veni

Double the U said...

"I vant to bite your neck!... HA! just -keeeding-, I'm from Austria not Transylvania"

USMC2841 said...

The house on Chappaquiddick must have been all booked up.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Now, now, Mareeyah, I simply did what comes naturally to all cheating whoremongers. Look at Bill Clinton, Jack Kennedy, John Edwards, LBJ, Dwight Eisenhower, Dan Burton, Jesse Jackson, Jim Gibbons, Strom Thurman, Elliot Spitzer, Prince Charles, Silvio Berlusconi, Newt Gingrich, Thomas Jefferson, Rudy Giuliani, Gavin Newsome, Fran├žois Mitterrand, James McGreevey... er, well maybe not Jimmyboi.

Submariner said...

>psssst< I can Make you Austrian by injection...

jj said...

Its OK. I'll call obama. He knows how to speak Austrian.

Spineless Vertebra said...

"Well I can assure you that's not a cell phone in my pocket."