Friday, April 08, 2011
1. Kid: "Thanks for the copy of the Kama Sutra Mr. Safe School Czar."
2. Kid:"So, it's not true that giant, flying viruses have escaped from the lab. That's good to know."
3. Kid:"What a pussy! Watch me slam that whole bottle of Jaegermeister."
4. Man: "Don't worry Billy, it's perfectly normal to get a big purple head while looking at women in bikinis."
5. Kid: "I'm impressed with the literature; I get free video games, trips to Disney World... but I have the feeling there's something you're not telling me about this Love Association you want me to join."
Best of dub
Seriously, Mr Thicke, I dont want to read your dirty limericks.
Best of Double the U
Wow, a coloring book of gladiators, thanks Captain Clarence!
Best of prince of leaves
Where Are They Now? Dondi retired from comics to become a school counselor. With careful management of his residuals and a generous public employee health benefit package, he will soon undergo the restoration surgery he has always craved to create whites for his congenital pinpoint eyes.
Best of Jack Reacher
"Congratulations, Timmy; you're now a registered Democratic voter in Wisconsin."
Best of Matt the K
Simon and Justin's first date: "You had me at 'Record Contract'."
Best of Submariner
Wow, Simon; a ride in your Corvette, a large sized Happy Meal, pictures of Paula Abdul naked, and next an afternoon swimming at your pool? I sure wish there was some way I could repay you!
Best of Spin
My GAWD, it's Tuesday... I lost a whole friggin' weekend!
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Wow, that sure was a big bean burrito, Jerry. Pull my finger again.