Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Higher Education at SUNY

Moonbattery


1. The planned menage-a-trois broke down in an acrimonious discussion over who was most hideous.

2. "Dig it, when do we get to off some pigs, Professor Ayers?"

3. Privately, Captain Picard was disappointed at the quality of recruits since Starfleet Academy had abandoned placement testing.

4. "Besides 'Condos,' what are some other forms of birth control approved by Planned Parenthood."

5. "We were told there would be Free Weed here."

Best of USMC2841
I will not screw her in a paper hat. I will not screw something that fat. Dr. Seuss appreciation course now offered at Berkeley.

Best of Submariner
V da K gives instructions to this weeks "Best Of" selection committee.

Best of Submariner
We've ALREADY signed up with the Ron Paul campaign...

Best of Mr. Hankey
...to share with us their experiences in what tea-bagging really means are ...

Best of Mr. Hankey
..and for today's "Show & Tell", Kyle and Julie will show us how "Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada" control their brains when they dress themselves every morning.

Best of dub
For the last time, NO, you can NOT get syphilis from sticking your pecker in an ivy bush.
By the way, where's Frank?

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
In one of his last public lectures, Steve Jobs unveils his latest invention to inquisitive nerdlings - the much anticipated edible iPod Dinner Roll.

Best of JohnS1959
Professor Jones' Keynesian Economics class at NYU ensures that graduates in fact do know SQUAT

Best of Jack Reacher
"...and so your assignment is to each take a bite of this roll, and try to guess where it's been. Begin."

21 comments:

USMC2841 said...

I will not screw her in a paper hat. I will not screw something that fat. Dr. Seuss appreciation course now offered at Berkeley.

Submariner said...

"...and the safe word should be something easily called to mind, like 'waterboarding' or 'chinchilla entrails,' or..."

Submariner said...

Students receiving economics instruction from Glenn Beck as visualized by most HuffPo readers.

Submariner said...

V da K gives instructions to this weeks "Best Of" selection committee.

Submariner said...

A typical Center for Creation Research think tank according to the ACLU.

Submariner said...

We've ALREADY signed up with the Ron Paul campaign...

Submariner said...

Why CAN'T we get a refund if we haven't paid any taxes?

mpur said...

Meanwhile, backstage at the "That hat makes you look like a douche awards"....

Mr. Hankey said...

...to share with us their experiences in what tea-bagging really means are ...

Mr. Hankey said...

..and for today's "Show & Tell", Kyle and Julie will show us how "Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada" control their brains when they dress themselves every morning.

dub said...

For the last time, NO, you can NOT get syphilis from sticking your pecker in an ivy bush.

By the way, where's Frank?

Adriane said...

"All hats are created equal," said Prof. Napoleon, "but some hats are more equal than others..."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

In one of his last public lectures, Steve Jobs unveils his latest invention to inquisitive nerdlings - the much anticipated edible iPod Dinner Roll.

-OR-

The Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Ugly Betty series spawned a little-known spinoff called Ugly Vampire Slayers. Here, the slayer tells her mentor she can't get a date to homecoming so he recites an incantation that summons a horny little demon.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Publish or Perish
Yep, my formula there on the chalkboard conclusively proves that kids don't know squat.

dadoctah said...

I'm not entirely happy with the latest Scooby Doo reboot....

Spin said...

Who knew Oblio wuz a redheaded gurl?

dadoctah said...

Still blocking out the next music video for this group: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjrVg7eRHrc

Anonymous said...

"We heard Anarchy 101 was an easy "A". Cool."

Vinney

JohnS1959 said...

Professor Jones' Keynesian Economics class at NYU ensures that graduates in fact do know SQUAT

Jack Reacher said...

"I'm just glad, son, when you made that hat there was enough material left for her shorts."

Jack Reacher said...

"...and so your assignment is to each take a bite of this roll, and try to guess where it's been. Begin."