Friday, April 08, 2011

Hehheh hehheh... you said 'cockpit'


1. "All right, everything checks out. Once you reach Libyan airspace, we'll check with Hillary and let you know if you have a mission objective or any other goal or objective."

2. ORA: "Nah, don't worry about Goose, I'm sure he'll be fine."

3. "Now, what's it gonna take to make you drive this beauty off the lot today? Can I throw in some free undercoating?"

4. "It's a natural male reaction to get wood in the cockpit... it's kind of how it got its name. Anyway, you wanna go dancing later?"

5. "No, Ron, you don't get to be Starbuck. I get to be Starbuck!"

Best of Mr. Hankey
...and that's the "Obama" switch. It drops a bunch of "I'm Sorry" leaflets with each bomb.

Best of Whacko
"Nah. I don't know which Lybian's we're supporting today. Just fly over there, drop some ordinance, and we'll tell you what you hit later."

Best of prince of leaves
"Don't worry about it, Zak. It happens to all guys now and then. Don't let it interfere with your focus on piloting, whatever you do, or Captain Thrace will fail you out."

Best of Jack Reacher
"...and make sure you return it full, or Avis will charge you $6.50 a gallon."

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Jeez, you took it out for a spin?!? Okay, no sweat! Go up again, fly backwards for 2650 miles to roll back the odometer. Oh, stick to the east coast... most air controllers take naps about now.

Best of Tremor
ORA: "And so that smug bastard flight lead asked if I was having trouble with my refreshment system. You know what I did? Rolled over and filled up the cup inverted. Then just to rub it in his face, I gave 'em the "Maverick Maneuver."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBQnS9UCq0k

Best of jj
So Joey, ever see a grown man naked?

Best of GregMan
"All I know is Admiral Odama said we have to 'reach out' to the Cylons and try to 'understand' their grievances. So make sure you do that before you blow them the frak out of the sky."

26 comments:

Mr. Hankey said...

...and that's the "Obama" switch. It drops a bunch of "I'm Sorry" leaflets with each bomb.

dub said...

Guy 1: WHATEVER YOU DO, DONT PUSH THAT BUTTON!

Guy 2: WHAT??

Guy 1: HUH??

Guy : WHAT?!?

Guy 1: HUH??

Whacko said...

"Nah. I don't know which Lybian's we're supporting today. Just fly over there, drop some ordinance, and we'll tell you what you hit later."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Relax, Lance, I've got it on pretty good albeit unattributable authority that you won't be classed as a war criminal regardless who or what you hit. Things are in what they in diplomatic circles like to call a "state of flux."

Mr. Hankey said...

"I'm a Libyan On a Jet Plane, don't know when I'll be back again...."

Mr. Hankey said...

Dude...here's $5...now stop trying to wash my windows!

prince of leaves said...

"Don't worry about it, Zak. It happens to all guys now and then. Don't let it interfere with your focus on piloting, whatever you do, or Captain Thrace will fail you out."

Jack Reacher said...

"No change; the Check Engine light is still on."

Jack Reacher said...

"...and make sure you return it full, or Avis will charge you $6.50 a gallon."

Spineless Vertebra said...

"No, Jim, I didn't mean grab that lever."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Jeez, you took it out for a spin?!? Okay, no sweat! Go up again, fly backwards for 2650 miles to roll back the odometer. Oh, stick to the east coast... most air controllers take naps about now.

Jack Reacher said...

"So, um, Dave, these flight suits...how are they with stains?"

Tremor said...

ORA: "And so that smug bastard flight lead asked if I was having trouble with my refreshment system. You know what I did? Rolled over and filled up the cup inverted. Then just to rub it in his face, I gave 'em the "Maverick Maneuver."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBQnS9UCq0k

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Submariner said...

So the problem is I get really "excited" when I grab hold of the firing switch. Then "Big Willy" jumps up and hits the Shut Down button. Any ideas, Bruce?

Submariner said...

Dude! That was POLICE Academy,
it was a PODIUM,
and most important of all, it was a GIRL!

Submariner said...

So, So, uh, what do ya think I should DO about it, Wally?
Well, Beav, Dad always said...

Carpe Phlogiston said...

I don't think that's what COMNAVAIRPAC meant by a "heads up" display! What if this lasts more than 4 hours and I'm not back on the carrier?

-OR-

I don't give a rat's ass about Don't Ask Don't Tell! You made the mess in there, you clean it up. And stop yelling "Splash One Bogey!"

jj said...

So Joey, ever see a grown man naked?

Submariner said...

Blew Angels...

Dr. Doom said...

"Ejection lever"?, replied Steve, "Well sort of"...

Carpe Phlogiston said...

"Stop tugging at the zippers, you perv!!!"
Why doesn't Bawney Fwank fly commercial?

Anonymous said...

"Colonel quick, I'm out of quarters."

Vinney

GregMan said...

"All I know is Admiral Odama said we have to 'reach out' to the Cylons and try to 'understand' their grievances. So make sure you do that before you blow them the frak out of the sky."

GregMan said...

"Put your little 'Saturn V' back in your pants and prepare for takeoff already!"

wv: lubcoci - more proof the Captcha has a sense of humor.

Submariner said...

NOT A CAP:

I was informed this past weekend that due to female pilots in the Air Farce, we now must refer to it as the "flight deck" rather than the traditional "cockpit." Please update your sensitivity training for future PC-iveness.