Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Ha Ha, Look at the Little Crackers


1. "Exactly! Bow down and worship your mahogany god, crackers!"

2. The children marveled, not only had the president stepped in the cowpie with both feet, he was laughing about it.

3. "Oh, I wasn't laughing at you. I was laughing at the two dykes who dragged that little boy into the killing field."

4. "I got your Easter message right here, crackers. 'La-il-la-ha-illa-Allah!'"


5. Kids: "We need an adult... to run our country!"

Best of HLam
    "You see, when I drop my shoulder and keep my leg bent I swing through the ball a lot better. I don't get that nasty slice like I did before."

Best of dub
    Thanks for making me a birth certificate kids.

Best of Cricket
    "Kids, I really wish I could help you. Michelle is really strict about her dietary needs. Just hope she changes her mind."

Best of Jack Reacher
    "Honey, I shrunk Chris Matthews and Rachel Maddow."

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
    Suzy, I'll bet we haven't found any eggs because his wife came out here before dawn and ate them all.

Best of Chronos the Wonder Pig
    No, No, Children - I will bow to you!

Best of Mr. Hankey
    What's a dazzling urbanite like you doing in a rustic setting like this?

Best of Uchuck the Tuchuck
    Hee-Hee! That's right Tommy! By the time you and Suzy reach puberty, your share of the national debt will be over half a million bucks!

Best of Submariner
    >snicker<
    Sorry I stepped on your Easter chick.
    >snicker<

Best of prince of leaves
    Having found their Spring Spheres, grateful Pioneers respectfully offer them up to Dear Leader.

Best of mpur
    No, seriously. Michelle's gone, just gimme my smokes back.

Best of Dactyl
    Johnny and Sally entertain the president with their live version of the 'two girls and a cup' video.

Best of Blue
    "Hey kids - want to hear a good one ? U K L Lee - ha, ha, ha......"

Best of Vinneh
    "Mister President, can you tell us if we are facing Mecca"?

Best of Mr. Hankey
    Those Brits can have their party...we're going to have our own WEEDING!!

Best of racerboy
    ORA: When my people come to colonize this planet, you will be on the protected rolls, and no harm will come to you.

32 comments:

Anonymous said...

The kids were shocked as Obama stepped on an ant hill twisted his foot and laughed.

HLam said...

"You see, when I drop my shoulder and keep my leg bent I swing through the ball a lot better. I don't get that nasty slice like I did before."

Dr. Doom said...

"Hey, this kid is sitting on my ball", cried the President, "I need a ruling... and my nine iron!"

Dr. Doom said...

"There goes the course", griped Mr. Obama, "When did they start allowing these people in here?"

dub said...

Thanks for making me a birth certificate kids.

Cricket said...

"Kids, I really wish I could help you. Michelle is really strict about her dietary needs. Just hope she changes her mind."

jj said...

Woman in background thought bubble, "Damn, there really is a hole in his back for Soros' hand!"

USMC2841 said...

I smile because I can tax you. I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it. BWAAAAAAHAAAAHAAAA!

Jack Reacher said...

"Hey, I've got an idea. Someone get me a magnifying glass."

Jack Reacher said...

"Just start off by organizing a community of ants, kids. Then, when you're ready for your next position, just walk away."

Jack Reacher said...

"Honey, I shrunk Chris Matthews and Rachel Maddow."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

My daddy says he probably laid all these eggs himself, too.
Well, my daddy says he couldn't describe an egg without a teleprompter.

-OR-

Hey, Mr. President (and I use the word loosely), is it true that the gold eggs hold Biden's remains?

-OR-

Suzy, I'll bet we haven't found any eggs because his wife came out here before dawn and ate them all.

-OR-

Using a talking OnStar might help Obamalama find eggs in the lawn, but I think it's a bit lame.
Oh, hi, we were just discussing the merits of your equal opportunity egg hunt.

Chronos the Wonder Pig said...

No, No, Children - I will bow to you!

Mr. Hankey said...

That's right son...no pull the blade up and over so your entrails fall out for Julie here to snatch them up.

Mr. Hankey said...

...and according to my Birth Certificate...we be kin. Ain't that a funny one?

Mr. Hankey said...

What's a dazzling urbanite like you doing in a rustic setting like this?

Mr. Hankey said...

Alright kids that's good for your first task. Now bring me....a shrubbery!!

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

Hee-Hee! That's right Tommy! By the time you and Suzy reach puberty, your share of the national debt will be over half a million bucks!

Submariner said...

>snicker<
Sorry I stepped on your Easter chick.
>snicker<

prince of leaves said...

Having found their Spring Spheres, grateful Pioneers respectfully offer them up to Dear Leader.

Rodney Dill said...

Kid: "Hey Mister... what's this piece of paper."
Obama: "Hey, that's my birth certificate. What's it doing blowing around out here? No wonder I couldn't find it."

sonicfrog said...

Why liberals make poor zombies:

"Brains.... uhhhmmmmmm....

I.... uhm.....

need.... uhhhmmmmmm.......

more...... uhm.......

uhhhhhmmmmmmmmm.......

brains."

Just awful.

sonicfrog said...

Crap - He's a zombie!!!! No wonder his performance in office has been so piss-poor awful!!!!

mpur said...

No, seriously. Michelle's gone, just gimme my smokes back.

Blue said...

Hey kids - did you get your autographed copies of Tiger Beat with me on the cover? Only 20 bucks at the table....

Dactyl said...

So you kids just stay here and watch that grass grow, and when it gets this high you come and tell me, 'kay?

Dactyl said...

Johnny and Sally entertain the president with their live version of the 'two girls and a cup' video.

Blue said...

"Hey kids - want to hear a good one ? U K L Lee - ha, ha, ha......"

Anonymous said...

"Mister President, can you tell us if we are facing Mecca"?

Vinney

Anonymous said...

"No, where looking for our future."

Vinney

Mr. Hankey said...

Those Brits can have their party...we're going to have our own WEEDING!!

racerboy said...

ORA: When my people come to colonize this planet, you will be on the protected rolls, and no harm will come to you.