Wednesday, March 30, 2011

That's No Way to Charge a Battery


1. "You okay Ms. Lohan? I mean... Lindsey?"

2. You just know there's a redneck in the front seat sayin' "Hey! I didn't even spill my beer!"

3. "Damn you, Mapquest!"

4. Numerous design flaws were evident in the initial design of the Car-tapult.

5. Among its other shortcomings, the Chevy Volt was a real pitch to recharge.

Best of dadoctah
"Okay, everybody remember where we parked!"

Best of Dr. Doom
"Honey - could you stop by the rental place on the way home and get the cherry picker again", asked Mrs. Smith on her cell phone. "...Yes dear I'm right inside the school zone on Elm street".

Best of Double the U
Early versions of using a car phone had some connection issues.

Best of USMC2841
Recalculating.

Best of mpur
Standard Cap #527: "Them Duke boys were in a heap of trouble..."

Best of molson
I swear officer I had to swerve to avoid some dipstick in a Spiderman outfit with the letters NYC on the front.

Best of Adriane
I sympathize! Really I do! A couple of Jolt colas and I'm wired for days...

Best of Submariner
440, 441; whatever it takes...

Best of dub
The Black Panthers fail at trying to intimidate the white guy that just moved into their neighborhood.

Best of Matt the K
The new Alpine Sky lift they built in Watts proved to be a big hit.

30 comments:

dadoctah said...

"Okay, everybody remember where we parked!"

Dr. Doom said...

"Honey - could you stop by the rental place on the way home and get the cherry picker again", asked Mrs. Smith on her cell phone. "...Yes dear I'm right inside the school zone on Elm street".

Bugs Bunny said...

I knew I should have taken that right turn at Albuquerque!

Double the U said...

Early versions of using a car phone had some connection issues.

Submariner said...

Some people have a moral objection to stealing cable. This guy? Not so much.

Submariner said...

I don't think I'd argue with the guy who claimed I bumped him at the light after he did this to my car...

Submariner said...

RECHARGIN UR PRIUS; UR DUIN IT KWITE WEL AKSHULLY

USMC2841 said...

Recalculating.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Famous Last Words #483
"Don't worry, I know a shortcut!"

-OR-

Ironically, before the deer jumped out in front of his car, Kansas Telcomm exec Abner Filtmorph was humming the Glen Campbell tune, Witchita Lineman.

-OR-

I know some women have a helluva problem with parallel parking, but that's just ridiculous.

mpur said...

Standard Cap #527: "Them Duke boys were in a heap of trouble..."

Dr. Doom said...

"Why are you giving me a ticket?", asked Miss Prudence,"The sign says no right turn - not no hanging from wires!"

jj said...

When the European Union says no cars, they mean it!

Silhouette said...

Kinetic parking misalignment.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Wingnut High tradition calls for tossing a little something over the lines on graduation day... a pair of sneakers, an old bra. Having failed 12th grade 4 times, Bruno felt Vice Principal Gorlick's car was a little something.

Anonymous said...

Anyone want to bet it involved a woman driver?

Vinney

molson said...

I swear officer I had to swerve to avoid some dipstick in a Spiderman outfit with the letters NYC on the front.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Dammit Hot Rod", a frustrated Optimus Prime fumed, "we'll never catch those Decepticons if you keep goofing off like that."

"But Optimus, I'm just hanging around!", Hot Rod protested.

Spineless Vertebra said...

"So, officer, what you're saying is that the birds are allowed to hang on power lines but my car isn't? How racist!"

"Uh, Reverend Sharpton, race has absolutely nothing to do with it. Just like everything else you complain about."

dadoctah said...

"Duh, PARKING!!!"

Adriane said...

I sympathize! Really I do! A couple of Jolt colas and I'm wired for days...

Submariner said...

Oh yeah? Well how do you dry YOUR car after you use the drive through car wash?

Submariner said...

440, 441; whatever it takes...

dub said...

The Black Panthers fail at trying to intimidate the white guy that just moved into their neighborhood.

Matt the K said...

Nissan's new 'Drive by Wire' technology still has some kinks that need to be worked out...

Matt the K said...

The new Alpine Sky lift they built in Watts proved to be a big hit.




wv: elermeni -- the letter between k and p.

Kaptain Krude said...

The *real* reason Megan Fox won't be back for Transformers 3. (No Transformers were harmed in the shooting of this picture.)

metalgarth said...

so... uh, Mr. Hulk, you didn't like that one. What would you like to test drive next?

Anonymous said...

Traffic Investigators later determined that this was caused by a trunk full of illegal Mexican Jumping Beans being smuggled across the boarder. DHS later set the driver free due to his Mexican Consular ID card being current.

-Oiao

Dactyl said...

Looks like Herbie really was Fully Loaded, after all.

[ORA? http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0400497/]

Rodney Dill said...

India reveals their new bungee powered space program.