Friday, March 11, 2011

Best AfterSchool Special Ever


1. The Girl Whose Weren't as Firm and Perky as the Other Girls, an ABC AfterSchool Special.

2. "So, you wanna wrestle on the floor and toss our hair around or something?"

3. ORA: If Joss Whedon had anything to do with this, the girl on the right is about to kick some serious ass.

4. European condom ads are the best!

5, "Mrs. LeTourneau stole my boyfriend, too. I say we cut that b-tch."

Best of Vinney
"That sucks. Hooters turned me down too. I don't understand it."

Best of Chronos the Wonder Pig
"...and if you are good at it, men will give you money!"

Best of Jack Reacher
I see someone's planning on being a union organizer when she gets older.

Best of GregMan
The new NPR after-school special, Heather Has Two Strap-Ons, was an immediate hit in the offices of the Safe Schools Czar.

Best of HLam
"Yeah, Mom, I hid your Vodka bottle in the old tire in the back of our trailer park. Did you have to follow me all the way to school to ask me that?"

Best of blue
"Your grandfather is Ray Bradbury?? No way!!
I'd sure like to f*ck him...."

Best of Rodney Dill
So Billy Jo, ever seen a grown woman naked?

Best of jj
Girl on left, "Sure I'll take you to the party. After a couple of lines, Charlie Sheen doesn't care..."

Best of Spineless Vertebra
"Look, how 'bout we settle this dispute like ladies. Let's just go on a talk show and discuss it on a couch with our legs crossed and hands on our knees."

22 comments:

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Bullies... stuffing nerds in lockers since lockers were invented.

-OR-

So what if I'm 19 and still in 10th grade? Ever think maybe Mr. Dorgenson keeps failing me because I give good head?

-OR-

Lucy & Charlie Brown, the Lesbian Version
Charleen, I promise, this time I'll let you out in less than a minute.
But, that's what you said last time, Lucy!
Well, this time, I really really mean it, honest!

Anonymous said...

"I want my training bra back...now."

Vinney

Anonymous said...

"That sucks. Hooters turned me down too. I don't understand it."

Vinney

Chronos the Wonder Pig said...

"...and if you are good at it, men will give you money!"

Jack Reacher said...

I see someone's planning on being a union organizer when she gets older.

Jack Reacher said...

"You're not going anywhere until you tell me why you un-friended me. Is it because I wouldn't buy fuel for you in Farmville?"

GregMan said...

The new NPR after-school special, Heather Has Two Strap-Ons, was an immediate hit in the offices of the Safe Schools Czar.

HLam said...

"Yeah, Mom, I hid your Vodka bottle in the old tire in the back of our trailer park. Did you have to follow me all the way to school to ask me that?"

dub said...

Girl 1: So, you want to go make out for a while?

Girl 2: Sure!

30 seconds later, massive earthquake in Japan, tsunami's, and complete devastation.

Thanks a lot sluts.

rodney said...

"What's a Bieber?"

blue said...

"Your grandfather is Ray Bradbury?? No way!!
I'd sure like to f*ck him...."

Spin said...

"whip It" brings it all to the big screen... well except titties that is.

Dr. Doom said...

Mrs. Hansen models the new school uniform. Sally thinks to herself, "Man I need a drink"...

Rodney Dill said...

So Billy Jo, ever seen a grown woman naked?

dadoctah said...

The anime version was way better.

Chronos the Wonder Pig said...

"Wanna play Barbies?"

Submariner said...

So let me get this straight; you're my grandaughter from the future, and you're here to tell me that your dad/my son - named Marty - is going to come to my house when I get to High School in order to get me to date and marry McFly, but I ALSO need to have a "love-child" with the big black football team tackle too?!? Give me some of what you've been smoking, girlfriend!

jj said...

Girl on left, "Sure I'll take you to the party. After a couple of lines, Charlie Sheen doesn't care..."

Spineless Vertebra said...

"Look, how 'bout we settle this dispute like ladies. Let's just go on a talk show and discuss it on a couch with our legs crossed and hands on our knees."

Submariner said...

You're new so you get one warning. Stan is mine, biyotch.
M - I - N - E.
Go near him again and I'll cut off what would eventually have grown into your boobs when you get to Junior High.

Submariner said...

I don't know. Who DOES wear "short-shorts?"

Submariner said...

Pardone moi, Marge, but you really should brush after you have tuna for lunch...