The weird part is, I found this while looking for a Thursday Babe post
1. Billy thought everything was going great right up to the moment Wilfred Brimley clocked him.
2. "It's from Barney Frank telling me I've won the 'Prettiest Boy' Competition. I get my prize at a Rest Area on I-95 outside Boston next Friday at midnight."
3. "It's from the Safe School Czar, and it's redeemable for a Free 'Clothing Optional' hug."
4. "It's an excuse note from a Wisconsin 'doctor.'"
5. "Not only did the school nurse give me condoms, she gave me a coupon good for 10% off my first abortion at Planned Parenthood."
Best of Wesley M.
After receiving this gift certificate in recognition of his stellar self-esteem, Nelson thought life would be smooth sailing until the cashier shoved it back at him and said, "It's called an expiration date. Can't you read?"
Best of dadoctah
"Okay, so I don't get the VIP tour of the Willy Wonka factory, but this ain't bad."
Best of Oiao
"I'm going to go eat this entire free pizza, and Michell can kiss my Cracker ass!"
Best of jj
Jake Harper's birthday...
Best of Chronos the Wonder Pig
"Hey Mom!!! I'm a registered democrat and the teacher sez that she will do my voting for me!!!
Best of metalgarth
Bobby Hill approved of the grand prize his mother won as substitute teacher of the year.
Best of dub
Standing behind Timmy is Coach Carl, with the longest left arm known to man.
Best of Julie the Jarhead
Cynthia Nixon's girlfriend strikes out on her own.
Best of JohnS1959
University of Miami recruiting scandals are becoming more mundane every day...