Monday, February 21, 2011

Toast

Campaign Spot


1. "No, Mr. President, we didn't say 'Propose a toast,' we said 'The economy is toast.'"

2. ORA: "The world may be, um, burning and dying outside these walls, but at we elites are safe and... hey, who's the guy in the red masque?"

3. "To paraphrase Oscar Wilde, "I am governing as I have lived, beyond my means.'"

4. "Allah bless us, everyone."

5. "And a toast to this delicious Soylent Green, which I understand is the ultimate solution to our social security, medicare, and carbon emission problems."

Best of jj
M'chelle is out of town....cheeseburgers for everyone!

Best of Jack Reacher
Obviously a gathering of liberals; everyone holding out his glass, waiting for someone else to fill it.

Best of blue
.."and after we fill our sample beakers, the lab will test for conservative leanings!"

Threadwinner: Submariner
"To Dawn..."

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Standard White House party platter since the 1900's - fatted calf wrapped in pork, taxpayer's blood pudding,
and snake oil promises to wash it down. Dessert? Big basket of sweet post-presidency jobs and pardons.

Best of prince of leaves
ORA: "Before we, um, start the, um, ritual, has anyone seen Mrs., um, Paddock?"

Best of JohnS1959
"And for the second week in a row unemployment figures increased by less than the expected margin", toasted the President, "Here's to leadership in action"!

Best of molson
Here's to Che.

Best of Adriane
Mein Fuhrer, I can walk!!!

Best of Army of Dad
All those in favor of sending Michelle on a cruise around the horn of Africa?
Motion carried.

Best of Dactyl
Here's to you, honkies!

28 comments:

Anonymous said...

what does ORA stand for?

jj said...

M'chelle is out of town....cheeseburgers for everyone!

dadoctah said...

"I'm not making a toast, dammit, it's just that my left arm has stiffened up from nicotine withdrawal."

Rodney Dill said...

"No Meatloaf again."

Jack Reacher said...

Obviously a gathering of liberals; everyone holding out his glass, waiting for someone else to fill it.

blue said...

.."and after we fill our sample beakers, the lab will test for conservative leanings!"

Submariner said...

"To Dawn..."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Standard White House party platter since the 1900's - fatted calf wrapped in pork, taxpayer's blood pudding,
and snake oil promises to wash it down. Dessert? Big basket of sweet post-presidency jobs and pardons.

-OR-

"Let them eat cake!" - Upon hearing more bad economic news, the milquetoast offers a toast to his comrades before everyone dives into a well-earned lame duck dinner.

-OR-

Every Politician's TOAST -
Here's to whistling past graveyards, kicking cans down the road, avoiding third rail issues and selling out to special interests, of being part of the problem, not the solution!

-OR-

Alternate Politician's Toast
Ask not what you can do for your country, ask what you can do to get reelected while ensuring a cushy private sector job if you don't.

-OR-

Sir, do you worry at all about being Mubarakized?
Raises glass Nah, we own politicians, got military and national guard, heavily armed police in every state, and loads of spy & disinformation agencies! Besides, this country is filled with dumb downed sheepul.
Er, sir, that's kinda my point.

WordVerify: tabackoi - Nicotine-laden japanese fish, pretty to look at and you can smoke 'em when they go belly up.

Anonymous said...

"Am I the only Kenyan at this table"?

Vinney

prince of leaves said...

ORA: "Before we, um, start the, um, ritual, has anyone seen Mrs., um, Paddock?"

Spin said...

♫♫ ON WISCONSIN,ON WISCONSIN ♫

BigBren1650 said...

♫♫ If you're destroying America and you know it, raise your glass ♫♫

Kaptain Krude said...

"Those silly, um, Republicans suggested cutting my, um, TelePrompTer budget. We'll, um, get them back by, um... um... um... Line? Hey, where's my, um, TelePrompTer, um, um, um, at?"

JohnS1959 said...

"And for the second week in a row unemployment figures increased by less than the expected margin", toasted the President, "Here's to leadership in action"!

mpur said...

ORA: It's good to be the king.

molson said...

Here's to Che.

Adriane said...

Mein Fuhrer, I can walk!!!

Army of Dad said...

"Please tax payers can I have some more?"

anon: Obscure Reference Alert

Army of Dad said...

Prepare to boast

Army of Dad said...

All those in favor of sending Michelle on a cruise around the horn of Africa?

Motion carried.

Army of Dad said...

"...and um, here's to uh, arugla!"

Submariner said...

Thawt bubble; Cabinet meetings are so much more fun when the Cabinet doesn't attend..."

Submariner said...

To John, uh, McClain; the reason I am, um, here.

Submariner said...

ORA:

NORM!

Submariner said...

Then it's settled; here's to nationalizing Facebook and Google next...

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Some cults do it with tainted Kool-aid, but given the birther issue, I figure this bunch for Hawaiian Punch with an ethanol chaser.

Dactyl said...

Here's to you, honkies!

Dr. Doom said...

"To Moammar Gaddafi, winner of the White House Humanitarian of the Year Award", toasted the President!