1. "Yeah, baby! This'll keep those kids off my lawn."
2. ORA: "Say 'What?' Again, Motherf-cker!"
3. And by eliminating Harry Reid in "Sudden Death," Phyllis Schlafly wins the CPAC Granny Clampett Lookalike Contest.
4. Phyllis Schlafly demonstrates Rule #4, the double-tap, on Newt Gingrich, who was turning into a zombie.
5. "You make the crosshairs, Sarah. I'll do the rest!" (And then Nancy Pelosi's head exploded... but not for the usual reasons.)
Best of Rodney Dill
Where do the D-Cell's go?
Best of Vinney
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Gloria Steinem's here? Where? I promise, I'll only wing her!
Best of metalgarth
Army of Great Grandma took no guff from the younger generation
Best of blue
Tell my grandson in the white dress that I want to see him now!!
Best of Double the U
Settle down Mildred, Berniece did not cheat in Bingo.
Best of Matt the K
Whoa, hey, take it easy Mrs. C.!! Joanie's still... *intact*.
Best of prince of leaves
2037: an aged and impoverished Courtney Love is forced to auction off the last of Curt Cobain's belongings.
Best of dadoctah
"Take cover! Martha Stewart's finally snapped!"
Best of Submariner
I'll bet you like this dress now, DON'T you Mr. Blackwell? And you're gonna run a retraction to your previous comments, right?