Saturday, February 19, 2011

But What About *My* Needs?

Fred Miranda


1. "Bad touch, Mr. Shatner! Bad touch!"

2. "Take it easy, coach. That's still tender from my nipple piercing."

3. "Whoa! I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine."

4. "All right, you can sell my used jocks on eBay, but I want a 60% cut."

5. "Red and green sweatbands? Fashion faux pas, coach."

Best of Submariner
ORA: Coach Manny wore the wrist bands to remind his wrestlers what he had done to his basketball players that hadn't done what they were told...

Best of dub
This weeks wrestling tournament will be at Saint Catherines Catholic Church.

Best of metalgarth
Don't worry, *I* didn't want to wrestle with girls when I was your age either.

Best of dadoctah
Ang Lee's "Edgar and Charlie: A Love Story".

Best of Matt the K
The last known photograph of Tony Randall.

Best of prince of leaves
"Sodomy? He barely knew me!"

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
This is the clench you have to avoid at all costs, Timmy. Your spindly arms will snap like toothpicks if you struggle.

Best of Uchuck the Tuchuck
Coach Anderson knew how to put the "Greco" into "Greco-Roman Wrestling."

Best of Vinney
"It's not what you think. I was just showing Timmy the Heimlich Procedure in case he gets something lodged in his throat."

Best of Dr. Doom
"Joey, have you ever seen a grown man naked", asked Coach Oveur?

Best of Kaptain Krude
"But Coach, my nipples aren't chafing!" Young Billy started getting a funny feeling about the whole situation.

Best of Matt the K
And from here, there was no turning back for young Keanu.

27 comments:

Submariner said...

ORA:

Coach Manny wore the wrist bands to remind his wrestlers what he had done to his basketball players that hadn't done what they were told...

Submariner said...

I >Ugh!< said; I'm NOT >UGH!< choking, coach...

Submariner said...

His best move is to get you in close like this and then pop a boner that wraps up to his hip. Don't let it scare you. Trust me; he doesn't know how to use it.

Dammit.

Oiao said...

"Don't worry Jimmie. We'll find a little black kid for your back too. You just could not compete against two mouths, four arms and all the dead weight!"

dub said...

Old guy: "And now I'll show you how to perform the Hindlick Maneuver."

Kid: "You mean Heimlich?"

Old guy: "More of less...."

dub said...

This weeks wrestling tournament will be at Saint Catherines Catholic Church.

blue said...

"Will you be may Facebook friend?"

metalgarth said...

Don't worry, *I* didn't want to wrestle with girls when I was your age either.

prince of leaves said...

"1 - 2 - 3!" [CRAAACK!] "Boy, that little girl sure did a number on your spine..."

Jack Reacher said...

"But in wrestling, Coach, I'm not sure what it means when you say you'll pitch and I'll catch."

dadoctah said...

Ang Lee's "Edgar and Charlie: A Love Story".

Matt the K said...

The last known photograph of Tony Randall.

prince of leaves said...

"Sodomy? He barely knew me!"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Uhm... yes, I was a priest. Why do you ask, my son?

-OR-

This is the clench you have to avoid at all costs, Timmy. Your spindly arms will snap like toothpicks if you struggle.

-OR-

The Mike Tyson Earmuffs - The ear you save might be your own! Only $19.95 plus shipping/handling.

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

Coach Anderson knew how to put the "Greco" into "Greco-Roman Wrestling."

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

Enough of this namby-pamby stuff. I want you to come off the top rope with the Atomic Elbow!

Chronos the Wonder Pig said...

"Ok Elmo, now you tickle me!"

Anonymous said...

"It's not what you think. I was just showing Timmy the Heimlich Procedure in case he gets something lodged in his throat."

Vinney

Dr. Doom said...

"Joey, have you ever seen a grown man naked", asked Coach Oveur?

Kaptain Krude said...

"But Coach, my nipples aren't chafing!" Young Billy started getting a funny feeling about the whole situation.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Thank God we're not soccer players, otherwise this would look gay!"

dub said...

His ear holes arent the ones he should be concerned about protecting.

Matt the K said...

And from here, there was no turning back for young Keanu.

molson said...

Wrestling? Oh no. I'm the soccer coach. Silly me.

Submariner said...

prince of leaves said...
"Sodomy? ..."





"Sodomy? He barely blew me!"

There, I fixed it for ya.

Submariner said...

Castro Street baby sitters were a bit different, to say the least...

Submariner said...

The coach whispers encouragement before the match:
"Two twinks enter, one twink leaves...
Two twinks enter, one twink leaves...
Two twinks enter..."