Wednesday, January 12, 2011

The Most Powerful Woman in the Universe

Duke of Red

1. Message received, Sarah. I will now kill Frank Stallone.

2. Sarah Palin was being rather generous in estimating Paul Krugman's penile attributes.

3. Somewhere in P-Town, a deranged Andrew Sullivan screams "She's pinching my brains!"

4. Yeah, I'd say that's a fair assessment of David Letterman's chances of surviving a cage match with Sarah Palin.

5. "So, Sarah, how close are you to punching Katie Couric right in the ovaries."

Best of Vinney
Palin illustrates the magnitude of MSNBC ratings.

Best of jj
Sarah shows the chances of Sheriff Dipstick's re-election chances.

Best of GregMan
Sarah plays the World's Tiniest Violin for all the left-wing libtards who are trying to blame her for Arizona.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
What was the real reason Bristol and Levi broke up?

Best of Mr. Hankey
Sarah illustrates the 1/2 inch difference between Paul Krugman & Bill Maher, the same 1/2 inch difference between a Pu**sy and an A**Hole.

Best of Dr. Doom
Sarah describes the three shot grouping placed into the heart of her last kill (caribou people, caribou)...

Best of prince of leaves
"Hey Markos, do ya think ya could wait for just a *wee* bit longer next time before accusing me of murder, hmm? Yah, 'kay, thanks!"

Best of dadoctah
"Dangit, I dropped my goshdarn doobie!"

Best of Jack Reacher
"How 'bout this much, Dub? If a girl has this much fat, is it too much?"

Best of Submariner
Dateline - 12:10 pm, Jan 20, 2013:
While taking the oath of office, now-President Palin demonstrates why she won't need Secret Service protection and snatches a slug out of the air. She then presents it to the Chief Justice Roberts as a memento of the occasion as she finishes with "...so help me God." for all the liberals listening.

29 comments:

Jack Reacher said...

"We're going to put political vitriol in the crosshairs, and declare war on imprudent speech, and beat nasty words to death. Better, Mr. Krugman?"

dub said...

Sarah responds to the obvious question: "Hey Sarah, what do you think are your chances or winning a GOP nomination?"

dub said...

Dumb Bitch....UR DOIN IT RITE!

Submariner said...

Sarah estimates the chances of MSNBC supporting Mitt Romney's candidacy.

Submariner said...

Hey Sarah, how much does it take to heat things up for Alaskan couples?

Submariner said...

Hey Sarah; how long do you give dub to live after calling you fat?

Submariner said...

Missed the Veep by THAT much!

Anonymous said...

Palin illustrates the magnitude of MSNBC ratings.

Vinney

jimmy said...

"Honey, ya got a little zit right there on your forehead...oops, sorry Mr. Biden. I've never seen your hairplugs up close before. Ya really oughta get that thing looked at."

jj said...

Sarah shows the chances of Sheriff Dipstick's re-election chances.

GregMan said...

"How smart is Barry? Thiiis smart!"

GregMan said...

Sarah plays the World's Tiniest Violin for all the left-wing libtards who are trying to blame her for Arizona.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Hey Sarah... do that bit where the mother bird spits worms in the baby bird's beak.

-OR-

What was the real reason Bristol and Levi broke up?

-OR-

What's the thickest book you've ever read?

-OR-

Show us how you'd sign "hi" to a blind man.

-OR-

How much do you think Republicans will accomplish in the next 2 years?

Mr. Hankey said...

"I'm crushing your head. I'm crushing your head!"

Mr. Hankey said...

So when people say to me "Let Sleeping Dogs Lie", I say to them, friend....Sleeping Dogs...they eventually wake up...and chew out the throat of democracy!

Mr. Hankey said...

Sarah illustrates the 1/2 inch difference between Paul Krugman & Bill Maher, the same 1/2 inch difference between a Pu**sy and an A**Hole.

Dr. Doom said...

Ms. Palin chimes in with the most accurate estimate of Nancy Pelosi's ratings in days...

Dr. Doom said...

Sarah describes the three shot grouping placed into the heart of her last kill (caribou people, caribou)...

Anonymous said...

How much effort is required to crush the liberal media?
Not much, when you have class.

Anonymous said...

Right now, she is crushing a trolls head.

prince of leaves said...

"Hey Markos, do ya think ya could wait for just a *wee* bit longer next time before accusing me of murder, hmm? Yah, 'kay, thanks!"

dadoctah said...

"Dangit, I dropped my goshdarn doobie!"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Tenuous Grasp of Current Events:
Sarah, how far apart would you say North and South Korea are, now? Oh, 'bout this far. My handlers got me a map so I could memorize the names of the 5 condiments.
Uh, you mean 7 continents?
Oh, yah.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Were Her Cankles in the Crosshairs?
Come on, Sarah, admit it... your staff must have had something to do with Hillary's trip, right?

molson said...

Heck yeah send that spliff my way. I am so gonna hit that.

Jack Reacher said...

"How 'bout this much, Dub? If a girl has this much fat, is it too much?"

Anonymous said...

January 20, 2013
All Rise. Ladies and gentlemen,
The President of The United States,
Sarah Palin

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Submariner said...

Dateline - 12:10 pm, Jan 20, 2013:
While taking the oath of office, now-President Palin demonstrates why she won't need Secret Service protection and snatches a slug out of the air. She then presents it to the Chief Justice Roberts as a memento of the occasion as she finishes with "...so help me God." for all the liberals listening.




Now I have to ask the DNC, is this hate speech or not since I've made the comment about your arch-rival?