1. It's like dub's posts on Thursdays, bitch... bitch... bitch...
2. "Hey Rex, how 'bout those Vulcan chicks, huh? Talk about giving a dog a bone."
3. "See ya later, Rex. I gotta go tell that mailman who lives next door to kill all the whores."
4. Yellow dogs... cash machine... there's a metaphor for congressional Democrats in there somewhere.
5. "No way! 1-2-3-4 is my PIN number too!"
Best of JohnS1959
This is exactly why you should never give your seeing eye dog access to your pin number...
Best of HLam
Not being able to withdraw any cash for the bitch bar, Rex silently cursed himself for using his ATM card as a chew toy.
Best of dub
Stupid Google...this is NOT what I meant when I searched for "Doggy-style ATM".
Best of GregMan
As is well known, HSBC stands for "Hey, Sniff my Butt, Cracker!"
Best of Mr. Hankey
"Hey...this is just like using that voting machine back in '08!"
Best of Submariner
Easy money-making scheme:
Wait for the cash to begin deploying and yell "Squirrel!"
Threadwinner: Jack Reacher
"Uh oh; Initech is going to freak when they're missing $300,000."
Best of Rodney Dill
"Damn.... where do the cats come out?"
Best of Silhouette
Obviously, a Savings And Bone.
Best of metalgarth
How did YOU think they got the money for the poker game?
Best of jj
Typical democrats....standing around in heat expecting money to magically appear...
Best of dadoctah
It was bad enough that they always had instructions in Braille on ATMs, but now they're letting service dogs use them?
Best of Artfldgr
Duke of Bush's baked beans eat your heart out...
Best of Adriane
So it's agreed ... we take all of our money out of the bank and bury it in the backyard ...
31 comments:
This is exactly why you should never give your seeing eye dog access to your pin number...
Not being able to withdraw any cash for the bitch bar, Rex silently cursed himself for using his ATM card as a chew toy.
The President's crack economic advisory team attempts to demonstrate why unemployment checks stimulate the economy only to discover that the $210 a week already went to cover lobbyist fees...
"Make sure to get you some Franklins, Rex", woofed Rover, "Bitches luv da Franklins".
Stupid Google...this is NOT what I meant when I searched for "Doggy-style ATM".
As is well known, HSBC stands for "Hey, Sniff my Butt, Cracker!"
"Hey...this is just like using that voting machine back in '08!"
Easy money-making scheme:
Wait for the cash to begin deploying and yell "Squirrel!"
Looks like we're heading into the dog days of the economic recovery...
Lhasa Apso? Really, Max? I prefer a nice Shar Pei; you can always find a new wrinkle to hump...
I guess those chicks took off the glasses and changed out of the skirts.
"Uh oh; Initech is going to freak when they're missing $300,000."
As it holds its value better than Dollars, bacon was used as currency for a trial period. In hindsight, the drawbacks should have been obvious.
When push-button technology equalizes the playing field for a lack of opposing thumbs.
Smell da money!
Hound Savings Biscuit Center
"Damn.... where do the cats come out?"
Obviously, a Savings And Bone.
The neighborhood bank was going to the dogs.
Vinney
How did YOU think they got the money for the poker game?
Typical democrats....standing around in heat expecting money to magically appear...
♬
Trouble, Oh, trouble trouble trouble trouble...
♬
It was bad enough that they always had instructions in Braille on ATMs, but now they're letting service dogs use them?
wv: tentfu. What Joe Bob Briggs found memorable about "Lawrence of Arabia".
Duke of Bush's baked beans eat your heart out...
So it's agreed ... we take all of our money out of the bank and bury it in the backyard ...
"Ha! Ha! Ha! Not only are those idiots dumb enough to send us their pin numbers and they think we're Nigerians"!
Vinney
Using the typical administration shell-game strategy, Elizabeth Warren gushed, "And ATMs will no longer be able to charge hard-working Americans excessive fees, and some of us may be converted into canines as a result of the regulatory improvements."
Beck's admonition that the US dollar was turning into shit was, in fact, far more prescient than anyone realized.
The stars of Eight Below discovered that life after the Artic wasn't all hugs and love from the producers. "Put that famed teamwork to use, bitches, and bring me some benjamins, or no food tonight," he said.
Last warning, Rex... stop peeking at what I'm typing or I'll bite you!
-OR-
I tell you lads, when these skimmers capture a few PIN numbers, we'll be dining on filet minon every night!
-OR-
What a scam! I wanted to transfer my master's savings into T-Bones, not T-Bills!
-OR-
Chauncey, you're leaning kinda close to the screen. Did you forget your glasses again? Don't blame me if your tongue gets caught in the bill intake slot!
-OR-
This might be an urban legend but did you hear about Spot, the drug sniffing dog? He went loopy sniffing a bunch of bills his handler withdrew from one of these things.
One more typo and I resign -
I tell you lads, when these skimmers capture a few PIN numbers, we'll be dining on filet mignon every night!
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