Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Tony the Christmas Gigolo


1- "The Mistletoe on the belt buckle never gets tired, does it, Tony?"

2- "If there's anything sexier than a squint-eyed guy in a plaid shirt with a monobrow and a thin, scraggly goatee, I don't wanna know what it is."

3- Her: "The best present you could give me? A little less Axe and a lot more showering, for one."

4- "You said you wanted a traditional Christmas. Well, doggy-style under the Christmas tree is traditional!"

5- Him: "Sh-t, girl. You don't look half bad after a case of Molson."

16 comments:

Dr. Doom said...

"What do you mean Santa already stuffed your stockings?", asked Bill.

Jack Reacher said...

"Hey, Babe; Santa has a package for you. Wait; where ya goin'?"

Jack Reacher said...

"I know how we can totally creep out the little gay kid by the tree."

Jack Reacher said...

"Santa knows you've been naughty. He reads the graffiti on the walls at school."

dadoctah said...

"I gave the excuse that I wanted to be a dentist; Santa would never have let me leave the workshop if he knew I was going to try out as a soap star."

prince of leaves said...

It was only when she noticed Trevor's Iron Cross necklace that Lacey finally made the connection -- it wasn't a Santa hat he insisted on wearing year-round, but a poorly-starched KKK cap he'd mistakenly washed with a pair of red socks.

sonicfrog said...

Tony foolishly asks if Nikki can shoot lazer-beams out of her boobies...

Matt the K said...

"And my stage name is C. Thomas Homo, ya like it?"

Dr. Doom said...

"Hey baby, wanna light my yule log?", asked Bob.

Submariner said...

Yeah, I know how to whistle; I just pucker up and blow... uh, pucker up and... well, you get the idea.

Dr. Doom said...

"No Martha", replied Bob, "I only take my Santa hat off for two reasons and sex isn't one of them... not with girls anyway..."

JohnS1959 said...

Steve models his new birth control hat...

Oiao said...

Let's not let a little yeast infection get in the way. Just think of it as eggnogin.

Submariner said...

So then Senator Frank says to me; "Do you mind if I push in your stool?" And I says back...

Submariner said...

Yes, I DID go to school on a short bus. Why?

Submariner said...

What exactly do you mean when you ask "Did you know your buddy, Senator Frank, is gay?"