Thursday, December 30, 2010

Star Whore


1. After the death star was destroyed, TK-421 finally was able to get the surgery he had always craved and become the woman of his dreams.

2.ORA: When Bea Arthur died, the Cantina in Mos Eisley was bought out by Darth Hefner. The first thing he did was replace the band.

3. As Madonna aged, she had to more creative in her perpetual reinvention. Truth is, under the mask, her face is pretty much Emperor Palpatine.

4. A storm trooper with Borg Implants... I love crossovers!

5. Since the Family Resource Council dropped out, CPAC has gotten a lot more laid back.

26 comments:

dadoctah said...

"Aren't you a little short to be a storm trooper? No, wait, not short...what *is* the word I'm thinking of?"

wv: shlailly. What a leprechaun with a cleft palate hits you with.

Son Of The Godfather said...

My new girlfriend is a real trooper.

Son Of The Godfather said...

I feel a great disturbance in my pants...

Son Of The Godfather said...

Jaba the Slut

Son Of The Godfather said...

I see two fully operational deathstars.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Gentlemen, I give you THE main reason our school should allow the Empire's ROTC program back on campus.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Obi Wan was arrested for using Jedi mind tricks to seduce young women... They're calling it "sex by Force".

Son Of The Godfather said...

My blaster's gonna need some time to recharge.

Son Of The Godfather said...

“I find your lack of scented body oils disturbing.”

Son Of The Godfather said...

“YAHOOOOO! You're all clear, kid. Now let's blow this thing and go home.”

Son Of The Godfather said...

ORA: "No, Chandler Bing, I am your father."

HLam said...

Bruce could finally come out of the barracks after the repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell".

Rodney Dill said...

These are the boobs you're looking for....

Matt the K said...

Spermtroopers the Musical was an arousing success.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Trixie's Thawtbubble: But I don't wanna give the Emperor a lap dance! He's a lousy tipper.

-OR-

When Darth and the Emperor saw the new Stormtrooper uniform, they looked at each other and shared a silent thawtbubble... "Tell me again, why the hell didn't we let the corps go coed eons ago??"

-OR-

For years afterward, Hans would mumble into his beer, "It seemed like a perfect plan to infiltrate the Death Star... shave and wax Chewie, give him a hormone shot and stuff him into a Stormtrooper uniform. Who knew he'd end up wanting massive boobs and a sex change?"

sonicfrog said...

OK... I take back my assertion that NOTHING can possibly save the Star Wars franchise!

Ver Word: Hootte

metalgarth said...

you have a bad case of 'teh ghey' if you even noticed the stormtrooper costume

metalgarth said...

'What happens in Mos Eisley, stays in Mos Eisley'

Ben Kenobi said...

'A wretched hive of scum, villany and silicone'

Dactyl said...

Jango Fett had some unusual hobbies.

dadoctah said...

I wouldn't risk it. I hear she's dating a Wookiee.

dadoctah said...

"Have you been to Strippy's on Tatooine? They got this one dancer there who I swear could make Yoda talk forward.

Anonymous said...

Once the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy was revoked on the Death Star things started getting too weird.

Anonymous said...

Once the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy was revoked on the Death Star things started getting too weird.

Vinney

Kaptain Krude said...

"And if you liked that, you'll love what's coming up next. M'chelle Obama performs a dance from her native planet Kashyyyk. Put your hands together and give a rousing Bootylicious welcome for the funky fresh rhythms of Wookiemania!!!" And with a panicked gasp, V the K awoke from his terrible nightmare, vowing to never again have Taco Hut's double spicy enchiladas for a late night snack.

Matt the K said...

You should see her sister-- R2-Double-D-2.