1. "Stop staring at my crotch, mom. You're embarrassing me."2. "The Gillette Fusion does wonders for my bikini zone."
3. "Mom, do you ever feel... not so fresh?"
4. "Hey! Those are MY White F--- me boots!"
5. "One more comment about my belly roll, Mrs. dub, and this baton is going right up your nose."
Best of Double the U
Tuck it in and hold just like this... good "girl"
Best of metalgarth
WORST. SETUP. FOR. GIRL-ON-GIRL. ACTION. EVER.
Best of Dactyl
"And it was about this long, and kinda sticking up straight like this.." Cindy described the email she got from Brett Favre.
Best of Submariner
You. Me. A bar of Dove. My red jelly pleasurizer. The Showers. Maybe the rest of the girls will join in?
Best of Artfldgr
Mom! You know i hate it when you watch me practice my pelvic thrusts for Rocky Horror weekends... where was i? oh yeah... its just a jump to the left... then a step to the right, with your hand on your hips, you bend your knees in tight, its the pelvic - MOM! your watching again!
Best of blue
Honey, you'll never get Ray Bradbury's attention if you keep you knees shut like that
Best of prince of leaves
"Honey, you really need to get some sun. Just look at that - you're so white you're casting an anti-shadow on the grass!"
Best of dadoctah
Marcy is stunned yet supportive; she didn't know Peppermint Patty even *had* any school spirit.
Best of Merovign
"No, Mom, knees together *like this*. Now I know why I was born while you were still in high school."
Best of Kaptain Krude
Now we know where the *very* white wimmen is at.
26 comments:
Tuck it in and hold just like this... good "girl"
..and if in your act you swallow the baton, you will be the most popular girl in school!!
"No mom, that's not fringe."
WORST. SETUP. FOR. GIRL-ON-GIRL. ACTION. EVER.
By counting each majorette as a marching band, the Obama administration counts 6,000 marching bands "saved or created."
What happens at band camp stays at band camp.
"And it was about this long, and kinda sticking up straight like this.." Cindy described the email she got from Brett Favre.
Don't worry Mrs Foreman, Eric is not going to un-wield these knees tonight.
Need more henna, Sunshine. That carpet still doesn't match the drapes...
Jill, I think I'm going to have to put you back in the band playing clarinet. The coach seems to thinks you're a natural for it...
"Cowgirl" is the cheer team name, honey. NOT the preferred pose for your Facebook profile picture...
One more time: when we throw the baton into the air, we catch it with our hand, not our, um, you know...
You. Me. A bar of Dove. My red jelly pleasurizer. The Showers. Maybe the rest of the girls will join in?
mom! You know i hate it when you watch me practice my pelvic thrusts for Rocky Horror weekends... where was i? oh yeah... its just a jump to the left... then a step to the right, with your hand on your hips, you bend your knees in tight, its the pelvic - MOM! your watching again!
The transformation of Tom to Thomasina always amazes mom so much that she cant stop looking...
show me again where the spider bit you
honey, you'll never get Ray Bradbury's attention if you keep you knees shut like that
"Well this will never make it on the red carpet, Ramone", said the brutally honest fashionista, "The make-up and fringe are atrocious and those boots - just horrible. I do like rainbow colors on a long stiff baton though"...
"Honey, you really need to get some sun. Just look at that - you're so white you're casting an anti-shadow on the grass!"
The new double-elimination format really sped up majorette tryouts this year...
Marcy is stunned yet supportive; she didn't know Peppermint Patty even *had* any school spirit.
"No, Mom, knees together *like this*. Now I know why I was born while you were still in high school."
The full-color life-size statue on the 50-yard line was a nice memorial for Cindy Throckmorton, yet another innocent majorette cut down in her prime by an unfortunate collision with the fat tuba players section.
-OR-
Honey, we're going to have to cut you from the squad. Your knees knock so loud when you march, they're throwing off the cymbal players' timing.
Now we know where the *very* white wimmen is at.
"Do you ever get that nagging feeling that somthing is about to fall out of the sky?"
Let me hear your war cry.
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