Monday, November 22, 2010

Pour moi?

Brender

1. The iWon comes perilously close to manual labor. Traumatized by the experience, he eventually resigns and takes a tenured position at the Kennedy School of Government.

2. "What can I say? Destroying America makes a guy hungry!"

3. "Ever see an old white woman get clocked with a pizza box? Watch this!"

4. Caryn kept smiling while discreetly making the American Sign Language gesture for "Butt Pirate."

5. "Yes'm Missy Dawn, I be bringin' yo' pizza, Lawd have mercy. Don' let yo' head be explodin' now!"

Best of paul mitchell
Patty Murray was depressed that her first date with the Obamessiah was less than swanky. And that he wasn't actually a girl.

Best of Jack Reacher
Halal Pizza gets a new customer.

Best of Vinney
Name one good thing that ever came out of Chicago?

Deep dish pizza.

Best of dadoctah
Every Thursday night, the POTUS liked to go out for pizza with (clockwise from left) Tina Fey, Seth Rogen and the mummified corpse of Andy Warhol.

Best of Mr. Hankey
Trouble is in store as Barack is about to feed Michelle after midnight...

Best of Rodney Dill
Obongo like candy.

Best of prince of leaves
When you order from Obamino's, it's there in under $30 trillion - guaranteed!

28 comments:

paul mitchell said...

Patty Murray was depressed that her first date with the Obamessiah was less than swanky. And that he wasn't actually a girl.

Jack Reacher said...

"Let's see, cheese, pepperoni, and arugula. That's it."

Jack Reacher said...

Halal Pizza gets a new customer.

Jack Reacher said...

"Nancy Pelosi ordered them for you, Mr. President. She said you'll have to eat them to find out what's in them."

Jack Reacher said...

After an uncomfortable moment where they both stared at the pizza boxes sitting on the counter, the employee realized Obama's had things handed to him all his life, and was waiting for his pizza to be graciously proffered.

Anonymous said...

Name one good thing that ever came out of Chicago?

Deep dish pizza.

Vinney

dadoctah said...

Every Thursday night, the POTUS liked to go out for pizza with (clockwise from left) Tina Fey, Seth Rogen and the mummified corpse of Andy Warhol.

Rodney Dill said...

"Life is like a box of chocolates... some taste just like shit."

Mr. Hankey said...

Obama took 4 planes, 5 warships, and 100 advisors with him blockading 20 blocks for 10 hours in advance for a photo op to pick up 2 sausage pizzas.

Mr. Hankey said...

"Look at me!! I'm playing a middle American dad!"

Mr. Hankey said...

Trouble is in store as Barack is about to feed Michelle after midnight...

Rodney Dill said...

It's just 'Chutes and Ladders' repackaged and called 'Hope and Change'

molson said...

I really wanted a fried bologna sandwich, but this will do.

Rodney Dill said...

Obongo like candy.

(WV:foolkin - This foolkin really look goofy)

Rodney Dill said...

Waffles AND Chicken

jj said...

It's easy for obama to pick up two boxes of ribs for M'chel for a snack. The deep fried brains of white, conservative children may prove to be more challenging.

ATDHE

Mr. Hankey said...

The customers all laugh as the owner of the Pizza Hut yells, "Hey, who's gonna pay for that??". Obama just looks into the camera & smiles knowingly.

metalgarth said...

Jes the way I like it... with arugula and extra gub-mint cheese!

Anonymous said...

Above his pay grade.

blue said...

with only 43% of those pooled saying Obama deserves a second term, the prez decided to hedge his bet & get some job skills...and the tips are good!

Submariner said...

Hey, Mahmoud; what am I bid for this here "nuclear football?"

prince of leaves said...

Unlike other politicos whose revolving door jobs tend to be rainmaking sinecures, former President Obama's post-politics job was a good fit for his actual skills.

prince of leaves said...

Tom Monaghan would later sue Obamino's for blatant copyright infringement.

prince of leaves said...

When you order from Obamino's, it's there in under $30 trillion - guaranteed!

Carpe Phlogiston said...

"You know you're spoiled when" #823:
During a Depression you can order deseeded watermelon by the slice.

-OR-

Obliviousness Be No Excuse
Alice steps in front of the camera during a photo op, is grabbed by the Secret Service and rushed to the Gitmo reeducation camp. The fawning liberal in the background is given a free trip to Disneyworld.

-OR-

Obamalama promises that any tips will "help balance the budget." Feigning outrage, John Boehner does the Sunday talk show circuit accusing O of taking work away from unemployed americans, then returns home and orders a pizza.

Anonymous said...

The photo op at Seattle's Top Pot Donuts took an awkward turn when the president mistook the dwarvish Washington State senator for an empty table.

Submariner said...

Puh-LEAZE tell me the POTUS' laxative didn't just kick in...

Carpe Phlogiston said...

I look like a fool cause the White House physician shot too much novacaine into my split lip.

-OR-

When Biden heard I was injured and thought he might be in charge, he told me to go get him pizza. I'm jest funnin the dumbshit. Gonna put some road kill in these, drool all over it and make him eat it.