Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Battered F1

Jalopnik via Racer Boy


1. "Aside from that, how was your date with Chris Brown?"

2. When you play basketball with Putin, *you're* the one who gets his face wrecked.

3. "All I remember is asking the Secretary of State if her pantsuit was available in sizes for attractive women, then everything went black."

4. "I just walked into a door. That's all. Silly me. Clumsy me. No need to bring Putin into this. I just walked into a door. Don't worry about it. Just bring me some Preparation H, and a shot of Vodka."

5. "Putin warned me that the Colt Python has a kick like an angry mule, but I didn't listen."

Best of Jack Reacher
"What's it like to get between Michael Moore and a buffet? Let me show you."

Best of dadoctah
And so Senator Palpatine went looking for his next padawan.

Best of sonicfrog
Hey... It could have been worse... I could have been dove hunting with Cheney.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
After his (49 years younger) girlfriend saw how easy it was to get jewelry off him, she privately admitted being quite irked... because she hadn't thought of just mugging him instead of sleeping with the creepy old geezer.

Best of jj
Never get caught between Schumer and a camera and microphone.

Best of dub
See, I told you...a glory hole is NOT the same as a peep hole.

Best of DaveP.
Man, that Zev Bellringer has a mean left cross.

Best of Double the U
ORA (REALLY obscure)
Us Tareyton smokers would rather fight than switch!

Best of Oiao
"Not to worry. I've taken harder beatings from Barney Frank's Man-Mate."

Best of Adriane
Jeepers! I didn't think that 'Hillary Gives State Dept a Black Eye' headline was supposed to be taken literally ...

Best of Matt the K
It was a tough break for Andy Warhol when he peeped through the glory hole at the precise moment Long Dong Silver saddled up.

Threadwinner: molson
If I had been any closer when Dawn's head exploded, I'd be a goner now.

Best of Submariner
So I says to her; "Why the long face, Sarah Jessica Parker?" And the damn mule kicked me...

26 comments:

Jack Reacher said...

"She insisted I was that Wikileaks guy, then she just went nuts."

Jack Reacher said...

"What's it like to get between Michael Moore and a buffet? Let me show you."

dadoctah said...

And so Senator Palpatine went looking for his next padawan.

Dr. Doom said...

"Next time he asks for the crossbow", thought Anton, "Just go and get it - don't try to talk him out of it!"

sonicfrog said...

Hey... It could have been worse... I could have been dove hunting with Cheney.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

After his (49 years younger) girlfriend saw how easy it was to get jewelry off him, she privately admitted being quite irked... because she hadn't thought of just mugging him instead of sleeping with the creepy old geezer.

jj said...

Never get caught between Schumer and a camera and microphone.

dub said...

See, I told you...a glory hole is NOT the same as a peep hole.

DaveP. said...

Klaus Kinski's resurrection was completely sucessful as far as function... but there were some unfortunate, appearence-related side effects.

DaveP. said...

Man, that Zev Bellringer has a mean left cross.

Submariner said...

When Army of Dad met dub...

Submariner said...

When pretty much any THB met dub...

Submariner said...

LKCTT:

While waiting for a camel to be brought to the set, John Milius volunteered to stand in for the beast if Arnold wanted one more run-through before rolling tape.

Submariner said...

Don't let the makeup fool you; this is actually a security camera still of a 17 year old Morovian female seeking asylum in Canada...

Double the U said...

ORA (REALLY obscure)
Us Tareyton smokers would rather fight than switch!

Oiao said...

"Not to worry. I've taken harder beatings from Barney Frank's Man-Mate."

Oiao said...

Star Trek episode # 15 rejected actor. Bele already did the half black leadership face acty thingy.

Poap said...

"Do these sun glasses make my ass look fat?"

Whacko said...

Phantom of the Men's Room

Adriane said...

Jeepers! I didn't think that 'Hillary Gives State Dept a Black Eye' headline was supposed to be taken literally ...

Matt the K said...

It was a tough break for Andy Warhol when he peeped through the glory hole at the precise moment Long Dong Silver saddled up.

Matt the K said...

Rocky XXXVII finally captured the magic of the original.

molson said...

If I had been any closer when Dawn's head exploded, I'd be a goner now.

Submariner said...

SOMEbody's keepin' their pimp hand strong, and it sure as hell wasn't THIS dweeb...

Submariner said...

So I says to her; "Why the long face, Sarah Jessica Parker?" And the damn mule kicked me...

Oiao said...

So I made this stupid joke about pointing into a trash can and yelling "Look, Jimmy Hoffa!", and the guy next to me was a Teamster Boss.......