Saturday, October 23, 2010

Shunned


1. In Amish football, shunning is the usual penalty for a fumble.

2. "What did they mean by 'chalk-faced whore' Tyler wondered as he walked away from them."

3. "Yeah, well I don't even wanna be friends with No. 9 ... three armed freak."

4. "Dang it, they never invite me to the post-game dog fights."

5. Billy belatedly realizes his faux pas. "Why did I have to invite them over to watch Glee? Stupid! Stupid!"


Best of Carpe Phlogiston
I want to be in that cuddle... um, huddle! I didn't say that out loud, did I?
They never slap me on my butt. Maybe these pants make it look too big?
arrgghh Must.Stop.These.Thoughts!

Best of Kaptain Krude
"I'm nine times the man that no. 9 is!" The math test on Friday was really getting into Kenny's mind.

Best of Jack Reacher
"Why do they listen to Number 9's plans? I keep telling them Plan 9 is from outer space!"

Best of Dr. Doom
"Man these guys are cliquish", thought Billy, "I wonder if the Fighting Aryans could use a tight end?"

Best of Mr. Hankey
I never get to play in any reindeer games...

14 comments:

blue said...

the square root of 81 is 9!!! so why is Brad leaving with that homo 22 & not me????

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Steroids mess with yer mind
I want to be in that cuddle... um, huddle! I didn't say that out loud, did I?
They never slap me on my butt. Maybe these pants make it look too big?
arrgghh Must.Stop.These.Thoughts!

-OR-

Hey, Wrongway! The huddle's over here!

-OR-

At Penetralia Isle (PenIs) High, customary punishment for an interception meant Beezer had to suck on the infamous blue dildo gag for the rest of the quarter.

Kaptain Krude said...

"I'm nine times the man that no. 9 is!" The math test on Friday was really getting into Kenny's mind.

Kaptain Krude said...

There will be no number 9 revolution around here once I tell Coach about this!

(Obligatory Beatle reference.)

Kaptain Krude said...

"Who is number one? Why does everybody worry about who number one is? How come nobody worries about who number 81 is?"

Spin said...

♪♫ I am a lineman for the county ♫♪ (high school)

♫♪ and I drive the defense♪♫

Jack Reacher said...

"Why do they listen to Number 9's plans? I keep telling them Plan 9 is from outer space!"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

His Cup Runneth Over
Coach Smithers! I think mebbe Ralph has a concussion from that last helmet-to-helmet collision.
Nah, he's just walking in circles mumbling in tongues to get attention. Ralph! Yo Ralph! Stop peeing in your pants and get back over here!

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Anybody look at those three jerseys ... 22-9-81 ... and try to recall their old school locker combination?
*1- in subby's case, the torpedo arming authorization code
*2- dub's so old, they didn't have locks, they just covered the locker door with twigs and branches.

Submariner said...

Thawt bubble: "What'd coach mean when he was puttin' me in at 'Broke Back, Tail Back' and why did he ask me what flavor puddin' I liked?"

Dr. Doom said...

"Man these guys are cliquish", thought Billy, "I wonder if the Fighting Aryans could use a tight end?"

Dr. Doom said...

Kicker, Steve Smith, completely misunderstood what Coach Randy meant when he said to "sell the fake". On the plus side he got $50 for #9, quarterback Bobby Ross.

Mr. Hankey said...

I never get to play in any reindeer games...

Anonymous said...

After a tough scrimmage, Brad felt the need to sexting a school newspaper reporter.

Vinney